Text 18071, 54 rader
Skriven 2007-07-20 16:31:04 av DAVE SACERDOTE (1:123/140)
Ärende: Yuk. A-1
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Although I still like A1 Steak Sauce, I don't like it as much as
I used to, back in the days when it was made in Hartford by Hublein
under license from Brand Inc. of the UK.  The original formula
survived several upheavals over the years - Brand was eventually bought
out by Hublein, then Hublein was swallowed by RJ Reynolds, then some of
Reynolds' brands were spun out to Kraft, and now it's not "The Original
Sauce Proclaimed A-1 At International Exhibitions" anymore.  No, now
it's just "A1" and all the gold medals are gone from the label in
favor of stupid advertising slogans and an ingredient list that now
includes high fructose corn syrup (aka Satan's Semen) and NO LONGER
includes anchovies.

And so Kraft, in absorbing a small label into their conglomerate, has
to tinker with the formula, packaging. amd marketing and still ends up
with a mature brand that they're not actually very happy with.

And that is why I have several bottles of really nasty alt-varieties
of A1 that I've bought on markdown to taste.  Let me tell you:  none
of them are worth two dead flies.

A1 Bold and Spicy - Features a Tabasco Sauce logo on the front label,
but actually has nothing to do with Tabasco Sauce.  Ingredients
include cayenne pepper.  Big deal.  Not that hot, just kind of
annoying in a really subtle way.

A1 Roasted Garlic - Words do not exist to describe how absolutely
f'ing NASTY this stuff is.  It tastes like A1 sauce with bad breath.
The kind of bad breath that makes you gag and vomit with just a 
single whiff.  I like garlic, but this stuff is so unpleasant that
I would like to find the person at Kraft who greenlighted it and
kick him in the balls.

A1 Thick and Hearty - GAHH!  Regular A1 is thin and pissy now that
they've replaced the anchovy puree with HFCS, so Kraft needed to
create a thick version that would imitate the consistency of the
original for those who like to put A1 on hamburgers.  It would have
been really nice if they had just put the anchovies back in, but no.
The "thick and hearty" version is an even sweeter version because
it has twice as much HFCS as regular.

A1 Kobe Beef Teriyaki - There is absolutely nothing "A" or "1" about
this variation, which seems to be a simple combo of HFCS, soy sauce, 
& some sesame seeds.  I thought it might make an OK marinade, but Lynn
and I tried it for both beef and chicken and both times it failed.

I haven't tried the Smoky Mesquite version yet, but I'm kind of 
afraid.  I bet it's going to taste like A1 with cigarette
ashes and bong water stirred in, and it's not something I'm looking
forward to.

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Minutus cantorum, minutus balorum, 
minutus carborata descendum pantorum
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