Text 21027, 111 rader
Skriven 2009-02-17 23:28:00 av JIM WELLER (1:123/140)
     Kommentar till en text av DAVE SACERDOTE
Ärende: Re: weiner
==================
-=> Quoting Dave Sacerdote to Jim Weller <=-

 JW> Is she a completely clueless bimbo or is it California that is
 JW> whacked out?
 
 SD> Neither.  Weinerschnitzel is a fast food chain that serves hot 
 SD> dogs out in the West Coast.  

 DS> In other words, yeah, California is whacked out.  In other news,
 DS> it's seasonably cold in Yellowknife and Spanish dictator Francisco 
 DS> Franco is still dead.

I still think she should have known all along what a real schnitzel
was. An old story from my friend Simon...

"For a young Vietnamese refugee who has just arrived in the USA,
life here can be so new and marvelous and bewildering... One of the
things every new arrival needs is a guided tour and explanation of
an American food market.

Canned foods always required special, in-depth explanations.  Most
of the time, there were too many different words on the front of a
label, and most weren't even in the dictionary. The trick, then as
now, is that canned foods have a picture on the label that is the
clue to what's inside.  Even without understanding the words, the
picture tells you that it is a can of beans, peas, corn, etc. Canned
sardines, showing both the fish and the fish sitting in tomato
sauce.  Whatever was pictured on the label, that's what was inside.
Even if one didn't know the word "mackerel" the label told one that
there was fish inside.  Canned milk could confuse a newcomer, since
the cans most often have a picture of a cow.  But that was an
exception to the rule.

About 2 weeks after Tam and Tien arrived in the US that Tam invited
my godbrother to stay for lunch. He set out a bowl of something my
godbrother did not recognize.  Some kind of brown meat dish.  Chunks
of meat in sauce. It tasted more like a bland American food than a
Vietnamese food. No trace of fish sauce or ginger, no touch of
lemongrass or chile pepper, little or no garlic.  Tam had sprinkled
some sliced scallion on top of the meat but that was the only
vaguely Vietnamese thing about it.  It looked very much like meat
that had been slow-braised in a Vietnamese caramel sauce, a Thit Kho
dish, but there was no sweetness.  And no bones, the meat was
boneless and extremely tender, so he asked Tam what kind of meat it
was.

"Dog.  It's so delicious, yes." Our Si Phu asked Tam to repeat that,
and Tam again said that the meat was dog.

The reason for my godbrother's instant alarm was not that he
objected to eating dog meat.  The reason was, as everyone is
supposed to know, Vietnamese MUST NOT EAT DOG IN AMERICA! It does
not matter how much dog one ate back in Vietnam or how much one
loves some nicely grilled "Thit Cho," one simply never again eats
dog once one arrives in the USA.

There was dread in my godbrother's heart.  He was going to have to
ask Tam where he got the dog, and he feared the answer.  There were
the rumors.  Unsubstantiated reports.  Hearsay. Had Tam done
something that seemed normal to him but was abhorrent in his new
land?  In Vietnam, certainly, Tam had been poor enough.

"Tam...  where did you get this dog?  Where did you get this meat?"

"From the American store.  Isn't it good?"

"Tam...  American stores do not sell dog meat.  Nobody here eats dog
meat."

Uh oh, my god, my godbrother thought.  Oh no!  Some stores *do* sell
dog... Had they gone to a pet store?  Had they mistaken a pet store
for some kind of live animal meat market?  Bought a dog from an
American pet store thinking the store was selling them as food? That
was something else that Si Phu never thought to cover in his
orientations. "Tam...  can you tell me where is the store, where you
bought this dog meat?"

"The store you showed me, the one right up there," Tam said,
pointing up towards Front Street. From the American "Food Value"
market.  Tam and Tien had bought it there a few times already and
thought that American dog meat was really tasty.  Very sweet.  Tam
spoke about how much better American dog meat was, compared to
Vietnamese, and how tender it was.

My godbrother insisted that American stores do *not* sell dog meat,
least of all "Food Value," but as he was trying to persuade Tam of
this, Tam offered to show him.  Tam got up from the table and went
to the kitchen, and when he returned he handed an empty can to my
godbrother.

The label on the can had the word "Recipe" across the top.  Below
that was a picture of a large, handsome, and meaty-looking dog.
Below that were the words "Dog Food."

The can clearly indicated that it contained a large Collie.

So Tam and Tien hadn't been dining well on tasty, high quality
American dog.  They'd been heating and eating cans of dog food.
Garnished on top with chopped scallions."


Cheers

YK Jim


... Small is small and large is larger. No other hyperbole is required.

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