Text 32475, 98 rader
Skriven 2013-01-10 06:19:00 av MICHAEL LOO (1:123/140)
Ärende: recent trip 73
======================
US4544 IPT PHL 1644 1738 DH8 4A

The way to Montoursville was only slightly slippery, so
getting to the airport took about the 15 minutes we had
allotted, and I was one of the last to check in, as the
inbound was deplaning. Also one of the last through the
machine, so after I was shooed through, a bit of a delay,
then the alarm went off. They said you've been selected
for random screening, which consisted of having my hands
swabbed. This silliness took all of thirty seconds and
probably served to justify the explosives machine's
existence for another day. I figured they were bored.

Some fidgety-looking guy took the opposite exit row
(despite the cancellations of the previous days it was
not a full flight); he had to be reminded about his
carryons and speaking of which had the air of a mortician
or a buzzard about him (think the Monty Python undertaker
sketch). I half expected something out of him so did not
sleep well until we were at cruise, so my nice 30-min nap
turned into a 15-min one. Right on approach he got up and
headed for the front, which made me think this is it, and
I tensed up, but he merely wanted to go to the bathroom.
He failed at this and in fact was cowed by the attendant
into staying in his seat even after it was allowed to get
up. We landed early, and I said hallelujah, time for a beer.

Only they put us at a remote stand, and it was actually a
bit late when US Air got it together to find a marshal to
park us in the exact right spot, then two buses to get us
out of there. At least they had separate buses for F and C,
this being the commuter and regular terminals, not classes.
I got to the club shortly after 6 to check my mail but
found that Pete, one of the bartenders I hadn't seen in a
while, was working, so I got me a Bourbon, which he poured
generously, so there was still a finger or two left when I
was done and it was time to go to the gate. I chugged the
couple ounces and was out of there.

UA3335 PHL IAD 1842 1951 ER4 12A

This is a relatively good seat, as it's a single exit row,
and I made myself comfy and comaed it the whole flight.

Having taken off on time and had no trouble on the way, we
landed a bunch early, and if they'd deplaned us right away
I would have been able to get the 2000 5A bus, and if not I
had the 2040 fallback. But, as with everybody express these
days, even though we got transported safely and timely,
there was a snafu - though the A4 area was open, and the
north part of A6 was open, we had been assigned to the
south part of A6, which had been used as a parking lot for
many baggage carts and apparently, although I didn't see it,
a fuel truck. I watched as 2000 came and went; then 2015.
I was thinking of having a nice nightcap at the club and
waiting for the 2120 bus, the last one that would allow me
to make my connection home.

It took us half an hour to clear the mess, and we were
allowed off around 2020.

On the way out an old lady rather disagreeably started to
fuss with the flight attendant about her bags and how was
she expected to carry them? The FA didn't know what to say
and said a gate agent would help her, pointing vaguely out
in the darkness. I waited patiently for everyone in a hurry
to get their gate-check stuff and then went to get mine. I
noticed her walking around and around the cart gaping. So
I decided to inquire about her situation: turns out that she
had checked two bags in Madrid, picked them up at customs in
Philly, then rechecked them, the correct procedure, and here
she was expecting to pick them up off a rinkydink cart in
the dark and haul them upstairs, downstairs, downstairs to
the train, and then upstairs again. I disabused her of that
notion - I had been disinclined to get involved after seeing
how she yelled at the flight attendant but rethought when it
was clear that she was on the border of panic rather than
the border of bitchery; I offered to show her the way to
bag claim, scotching my dreams and hopes for free alcohol.
So I escorted her to the carousel, something that a United
employee should have done, and parked her there and went to
the bus stop in the hope that it hadn't left, and guess
what, it was sitting there waiting, and in fact continued to
wait for two minutes beyond departure time.

I caught the bus back, made various connections, and just
missed the second-to-last bus; so I had time for my nightcap
after all, though it cost $8 instead of just a $1 tip.

There was still nearly a pound of sausages in my grub bag,
so I made a big pot of Spanishish rice using these for the
more customary hot dogs. Told my brother that he could have
some, so he ate the bulk of it; luckily I got enough for
two snacks, which was all I needed.

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