Text 1894, 109 rader
Skriven 2013-06-29 07:44:00 av MICHAEL LOO (1:123/140)
Ärende: food network 785
========================
So I'm out here in the boonies with no transport
except when a friend can be convinced to come out
to visit, and what does one do? I've been watching
far more TV than I ever, especially as after dinner
I have to wait for the dog and cats to go out, do
their business, and then come back inside, which
they do on their own schedule. These last days
having been either hot and humid or cold and rainy,
I really don't want the beasts to be waiting outside.
So when I'm tired of Malcolm Gladwell, which happens
fairly easily, the tube is the way to go. It's food
or feud, though I backslid and watched an episode of
America's funniest something or other the other day
and didn't find it particularly funny. I look at
BBC and Travel more than Food, because the production
values are better; Food and Travel are owned by the
same lowest-common-denominator Scripps, so I don't
know what that is all about (I understand BBC).

Gordon Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares. All the shows are
formulaic, but this is one of the worst. Restaurant is
failing. Gordon comes in, has what he describes as a
terrible meal (sometimes the food doesn't always look
that bad). He proposes changes. The owners and/or
chefs balk. There is a fight. Gordon says, you vill
do vat I say und you vill like it! His team comes in,
redoes the dining room, he puts his own touch on the
menu, they teach the kitchen staff this menu in a
matter of hours (yeah, right), and the restaurant
reopens. Of course it's a disaster, after which Gordon
calls a meeting, imparts his wisdom, and the restaurant
begins to thrive. THIS HAPPENS EVERY TIME. What a joke.

Restaurant Stakeout. Take a slimeball owner, slimeball
employees, and a crap menu, and what do you get? A
failing restaurant. What do you do? Hire a slimeball
to install hidden cameras and watch as the restaurant
staff does what it does (according to script). Another
formula. Restaurant is in trouble. Willie Degel sits
in his command post (which is tricked out all the same
each episode) and watches the monitors, which somehow
manage to capture every little nuance of course - the
waitress with attitude rolls her eyes direct into the
camera, the cooks pick their nose, the bartender steals.
Then Willie comes into a staff meeting and gives them
all the what-for, after which everyone promises to do
lots better (except for the waitress with attitude who
quits on the spot). THIS HAPPENS EVERY TIME. What a joke.
And the scripts are terrible - full of improbabilities
and inconsistencies.

No Reservations. I like Bourdain and have a high
tolerance for profanity and rudeness, especially when
it is packaged entertainingly. But this ties with the
above two for least sincere, most produced shows I've
ever seen. Again the formula: Tony goes to a place that
he has never been to but thinks is going to be a drag.
He finds a "friend" or few to show him the wonders of
the place, which almost always involve grilled animal
(favorites being sheep and pigs) and a few local oddities
that people will say yuck at. Tony is won over. Tony
pontificates at the end, saying that when he came to
town, he thought the cuisine was abominable and the
inhabitants the scum of the earth, but he has seen the
light and now he understands all, and food is the best
way to bring peoples together, end of story. THIS
HAPPENS EVERY TIME. What a joke.

The Layover. Ditto the above; there is really no
distinction between the two shows.

The Minimalist. I had the utmost admiration for Mark
Bittman based on his writings. This show makes him look
like an unsightly nerd with no imagination and who can't
cook. Sad.

Man vs. Food. The premise is disgusting, Adam Richman is
disgusting, the show is kind of amusing.

All the Food Network "stars" - boring. Giada and Nigella
are cute, but that wears thin after a while. Ann Burrell
is an arrogant no-talent. Robert Irvine is a total fraud
as well as an arrogant no-talent.

There's one show that I find not so bad as I previously
thought and made it out to be, that being Bizarre Foods.
If one looks at it as a travel show and not a bizarre
show, it can be okay. I think one thing is that Zimmern
is not afraid to go off script once in a while, plus he
doesn't mind being unsightly, making fun of it at times,
which I suppose is the most viable solution to his
unfortunate appearance.

So when Zimmern isn't on, I watch Family Feud.

One further observation. Paula Deen makes my skin crawl.
But railroading her out of town because at some point in
the distant past she used the N word, that's just plain
silly. I figure everyone who has ever lived south of the
Mason-Dixon line who is over about the age of 12 has used
this word at one time or another. Except me, of course,
who have never said nigger out loud until just now, by
myself, just to see if I could actually say it (I can,
just barely). Anyway - firing her for being a bad cook,
fine; firing her for being a cloying, boring personality,
fine. Firing her for having said a taboo word on her own
time, purest hypocrisy.
--- Platinum Xpress/Win/WINServer v3.0pr5
 * Origin: Fidonet Since 1991 Join Us: www.DocsPlace.org (1:123/140)