Text 386, 129 rader
Skriven 2013-05-24 11:04:00 av MICHAEL LOO (1:123/140)
     Kommentar till en text av RUTH HAFFLY
Ärende: food network 596
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 ML> Huh, maybe those who said (before Websites) that I should have
 ML> a cooking show were right. Maybe those who said that I should
 ML> have had a Website were right, too. Too bad.
 RH> Coulda, shoulda, woulda. I've still not written The Great American
 RH> Novel either. (G)
 
In real life, not for a moment have I considered doing those
things, though a frequent thought that crosses my mind when
encountering them is "I could do that a lot better, and so
could my friends." I did have qualms when my sister was dying,
and we were having fun in the kitchen, and her commentary was
so erudite and pithy that I thought, this should have been
preserved for posterity; but it wasn't. Clean Dave and I used
to joke about doing a show where we swilled beer and ate junk
food and made fun of Rachael or Sandra or Emeril.

 ML> Some of the longest-lived people I have known have been
 ML> alcoholics. Of course, others have been teetotallers too.
 RH> And most have probably been somewhere in between the two ends

The most immoderate people I have known have also tended to be
the ones with extreme life spans as well. I'm wondering about
my friend whom I spent yesterday with, as he's coming up on 70
I think but has been a drug addict (bad ones) most of his life,
has bladder cancer and Hep C, was a severe alky (and now is more
censorious of alcohol intake than, say you would dream of being).
I've been waiting for him to keel over for 20 years but now am
resigned to his living longer than I will. He ascribes some of
this longevity and certainly his lack of discomfort to the medical
use of marijuana, which is now legal in his state.

Speaking of which, he gave me a half dose of brownie to help cure
my jet lag. Didn't work. Note to all: hemp seeds add an almost
pepperlike aroma and flavor to chocolate things. Note to self:
marijuana doesn't agree with me now any more than it ever did.

 ML> Very few of my friends are or were more Martha Stewartish than
 ML> Erma Bombeckish.
 RH> I think she's too over the top for most people--but she does have her
 RH> devotees as witnessed by her comeback after spending time in prison.

The current Hemispheres magazine has an interview with Martha.
I don't like her any more from this than I do from her shows.

I had a friend who outdid Martha before Martha was Martha. This
friend (utterly gorgeous) was a cake baker who quoted Shakespeare,
if you know the type. Spotless house despite two boys and two dogs.
Cooked simply but well, moved like a cat, never a hair out of
place. A smile (utterly gorgeous) and a witty word for everyone
always. Her secret: she had her husband build a secret room under
the staircase but that was about five times bigger than you would
think (it extended, of course, way past the stairwell). One day
she said, I want to show you something, and I half expected it to
be a pleasure palace with a giant waterbed, or a torture chamber,
or a library. Instead, it was maybe 400 square feet filled with
all the junk that you don't know what to do with, only it has to
go someplace, so she threw in whatever inconvenient or untidy items
were cluttering up her life, and the rest of the house was spotless,
this room being its Dorian Gray portrait. I wonder if Martha and
Sandra have such rooms.
 
 ML> I will hit you with one of the most interesting and
 ML> worst today, then it'll be mostly out of my system.
 RH> Now some have been fun to read, if only for the sheer incredulity of
 RH> how poor a lot of people cook. And even more incredible is that some
 RH> people make so much money putting out "recipies" for those non cook
 RH> cooks. 

Those were the lessons I took from those recipes.

 ML> Gazpacho Monterey
 ML> categories: really astonishing, really bad, not kidding
 RH> You mean you actually have to tear up bread, peel garlic, chop up
 RH> cilantro and cut up limes into wedges? Is that within the reach of her
 RH> camp followers? Seriously, I'm mentally gagging on the imagined taste
 RH> too.

The Food Network site has a comment page on which some people
admit to having made this; their comments were in general not
favorable.

Pork cutlet and spaetzle
categories: main, airline
servings: 6

6 boneless pork cutlets, 5 oz each
1 1/2 c milk
1 c flour
3/4 ts salt
2 eggs
2 1/4 c unseasoned breadcrumbs
1 c finely grated Parmesan
3/4 c oil
1 lb pk spaetzle
3 Tb sweet butter
1 Tb sage, chopped
s, p

Breaded pork cutlet and spaetzel [sic] with brown butter and sage

Place cutlets between two sheets of plastic wrap and pound
evenly to 1/4" thickness. Marinate in milk at least 1 hr,
covered, in fridge.

Combine flour and salt in one dish; beat eggs in a second
dish; combine crumbs and cheese in a third dish. M says
omit cheese.

Drain cutlets and pat dry. Dredge each cutlet in flour until
completely dry. Dip in egg to coat and allow excess to drip
off. Roll quickly in crumbs.

Heat oil in heavy skillet on medium high heat. Fry cutlets
3-4 min, moving around with a fork to make sure they don't
stick to the pan. Do not crowd. Flip and cook until both
sides are golden. Drain on paper towels.

Cook spaetzle according to package directions. Drain and
set aside,

Melt butter over medium heat. Swirl butter with a spatula
until it starts to brown. Add spaetzle and saute until
golden. Add sage, correct seasoning, and serve with cutlets.

Gerry Gulli, Hemispheres magazine 5/2013

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