Text 12948, 148 rader
Skriven 2005-09-24 12:09:11 av Roy Witt (1:1/22)
  Kommentar till text 12640 av Carol Shenkenberger (6:757/1)
Ärende: Cell phone cost
=======================
22 Sep 05 19:31, Carol Shenkenberger wrote to Roy Witt:

 CS> *** Quoting Roy Witt from a message to Carol Shenkenberger ***

 CS>>> teens and i dont recall much change in diet other than she reduced
 CS>>> her coffee intake and took to a decaf type for most of the day.
 RW>>> Ahhh, coffee. I wasn't restricted in my diet at all. Although they
 RW>>> did I should cut down on coffee. Since we've moved here, the coffee
 RW>>> pot ha been nearly retired. I make a pot when I get an urge for it,
 RW>>> but it's a daily or even a weekly thing.

 CS>> Mom was a mega-coffee person before that.

 RW>> Sounds like my dad. Two pots a day. More if he could get it.

 CS> Yeah, she took it down with little hassle to what the Doc said was ok
 CS> and left it at that.

His problem was Emphysema, so he never did cut down on coffee. Coffee was
probably the only thing he enjoyed in his last days.

 RW>> That's one way of doing it. Still keeps her on the caffiene though.

 CS> It was within what the Doc said was ok.  She wasnt told to cut all
 CS> caffiene, just get it to sensible levels.

Sounds like good advice.

 RW>>> that have to worry about the offsets are in your first year of
 RW>>> retirement benefits.

 CS>> I think Mom delayed thst til she hit 72?  She didnt work all that
 CS>> much in any way that counts for social security wages.  Her
 CS>> ex-husband (my father) remarried and I think the second wife gets
 CS>> the Social Security?

 RW>> She's entitled to some of his. Whatever those married years added up
 RW>> t that'd be the determining factor.

 CS> She's probably getting that then.

Good. She probably deserves it.

 CS>> Her time with Dad was only 6-7 years and the only divorce decree was
 CS>> child support of 52$ a month for 3 kids.

 RW>> He got off cheap.

 CS> He didnt pay that even.  Took a court order when I was 10 to get the
 CS> payments started.  Have a classic letter from 'Gov Reagan' that we
 CS> had to move to California to actually get the money and no
 CS> backpayments could be expected.  So, 8 years he didnt even pay that.
 CS> 52,000$ Mom added up in 'arrears' out of that minimal payment before
 CS> I turned 18.

Had she persued it, the state (CA) will enforce those support payments,
and make him catch up the amount that he was in arrears. They did that to
a friend of mine, only vice versa, CA to IL...he was jailed twice in SD
for back support on charges of non-support in Illinois, he lived in CA,
she lived in IL. They also honor extradition for non-support from other
states, so she could have had him extradited to Illinois and jailed there
or made to pay up.  But, there was no need ad CA made sure he paid every
penny of it.

 CS> To give Dad credit though, Mom left him high and dry when he went to
 CS> work one day with no warning.  She loaded us 3 kids in the car and
 CS> took off from NY city to Florida and it was 2 years before he even
 CS> knew where we were. Since she owned the house they lived in, she sold
 CS> it without even telling him.  He would not have felt very good about
 CS> that since it was sold with only 2 days notice that he had to move
 CS> out and by a proxy that would only tell him we were alive and well.

Ewwwww. That must have hurt.

 CS> Why did Mom do that?  Well, it's a bit sordid but my older sister was
 CS> born 6 months after they married and dad just wasnt ready for 'MS
 CS> Furtile Turtle' whoi gave 3 kids in 4 years.  Sad to say, he became
 CS> apparently abusive and Mom got scared so skipped town with us 3.  I
 CS> have to this day, either congential or early age back damage that
 CS> causes me trouble and lead to the C-section I had to have with
 CS> Charlotte.  Mom swears the final moment was when he drop-kicked me
 CS> out of a high chair across the room.  She left the next day.  I was
 CS> about 18 months old.

First off, C-sections are easier on the body, so you're better off for it.
Had a Psyc teacher in college once who swore by them. She had 3 kids that
way.

I assume your mother and father were very young when they had to get
married. That's typical behavior for people who're not mature enough to
handle the burden they have to carry at that young age.

Take care of your back, it's a miserable life as you age if you don't.

 CS> I cant reconcile this though with the man I met later as an adult.
 CS> He said Momn was a bit 'touched' always but a good person.  I suspect
 CS> there is a bit of a mix that happened and at worst, Dad married
 CS> because it 'was the right thing to do' and did his best.

Yeup. That's the way things were in those days. But it takes two to tango.

 CS>>  Mom 'self employed' by using her small inheritance from her parents
 CS>> to get a house and fix it up, then sell for more than it cost and we
 CS>> lived off the proceeds.

 RW>> Hopefully she invested some of it in another house.

 CS> Yes, which is why I've lived so many places.  Almost like military
 CS> transfers, every 2-3 years.  Mom timed the sales to hit summer so I
 CS> rarely had to change schools in the middle of a year.  That money was
 CS> used to raise us 3 kids.

No offense, but it does sound like she might be a 'little touched'..Nancy
was that way with her ex, took both youngsters and fled from SD to SF,
thinking that the guy she went with in college would still be available.
Wrong. She ended up in a convent for a place to stay in SF and the ex
sicked the sherrif on her. He dragged her back to SD and put in her County
Mental Health. Big mistake, because by then he had aroused the rath of her
mother, who was a lot more touched than Nancy (which I found out while
dating her). His famous last words to Nancy at the end of this ordeal was
'Please don't sick your mother on me again.'...

 RW>>> How sweet of her.

 CS>> Yeah, thats Mom!  Gotta admit, I am probably a bit like her.  At
 CS>> least, I'd like to think so!
 CS>>                                        xxcarol

 RW>> I'm sure you are. Narry a nasty word out of you in all the years
 RW>> I've known you here. Even in the heat of battle.

 CS> Naw.  You think too highly.  I have been known to make my share of
 CS> bitchy comments.

I know, I've seen um. Still, you're far easier going than anyone here.

 CS>   I'm just not 'prone' to them as an average, and less so since I
 CS> came to Z6.  Perhaps my pith is a bit more restrained trhan yours
 CS> *gulp, sure is!* but I'm not so pristine.
 CS>                                        xxcarol

Well, you havn't convinced me. :o)


Roy

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