Text 1181, 150 rader
Skriven 2005-02-12 02:30:04 av Greg Sears (1:153/307)
     Kommentar till en text av Heather Lennox
Ärende: Stories
===============
G-day Heather,

Gadzillion Things To Think About

  At a pancake breakfast for charity I have yet to get some that are
actually cooked. Why does somebody always ask if they are fresh?

  Butter isn't a liquid and it isn't really a solid. Just what is butter,
anyway?

  Did you ever think deviled eggs were satanic?

  Do Chinese people get hungry an hour after they eat American food?

  Have you ever considered where we would be without 'Crazy Dips'? Would
we ever see eating regular lollipops a bore afterwards? Or is that just
us?

  How come there is light butter but no dark butter?

  How did people ever figure out that eggs were edible?

  How do they get the ruffles in the potato chip? Does someone sit there
and fold each one?

  How does a thermos know whether a drink should be hot or cold?

  How many tiny packets of duck sauce and soy sauce do you suppose are
tossed out every night with empty take-out Chinese food containers?

  If marshmallows could talk would they speak in a high voice or a low
voice?

  If MINUTE RICE takes a minute on the stove then how long would it take
in a microwave?

  If you are what you eat haven't you eaten yourself?

  If you ate alphabet soup and then got an x-ray, what would it say?

  If you ate pasta and anti-pasta would you still be hungry?

  If you buy a container of "light" butter do you get more than in a
container of the regular stuff?

  If you eat at mid-morning it's called 'brunch' so if you eat at mid-
afternoon is it called 'lupper'?

  If you ordered a pizza with no toppings would you have to pay extra
because it's a specialty pizza?

  If you swallow a bit of yeast when you go to bed at night, will you
rise early in the morning?

  In a jar of crunchy peanut butter, why are all the nuts at the top?

  Is anyone working on a Bestoshire Sauce? Or have our standards really
fallen that far?

  Is the reason fruit cake is soaked with rum so that no one will notice
that it is last year's fruitcake?

  Is there any food that you CAN'T fry?

  Isn't the only problem with home canning the fact that eventually
you'll have to eat the stuff?

  Just how much is much? And when you eat a lot why do we always eat
two(too) of them?

  On the Pop-Tart box why do they state 'Warning: Pastry Filling May Be
Hot When Heated'?

  Since life is short shouldn't we be eating our dessert first?

  What are you suppose to feed your pet peeve?

  What exactly are low-salt saltines?

  What is the difference between a ruffled potato chip and a non ruffled
potato chip? Don't they have the same ingredients?

  What would forest preserves taste like? What would the ingredients be?

  Why are raisons without seeds called 'seedless' but prunes without pits
are called 'pitted'? What is so wrong with the word 'pitless'?

  Why do crackers come in boxes but chips come in bags?

  Why do our seniors keep telling us we should eat food that will stick
to our ribs? Just how is that accomplished?

  Why do peanut shells have dents?

  Why do potato chips that are curled taste better than the others?

  Why do the makers of Minute Rice give their product that name when it
takes 5 minutes to cook?

  Why do they call it "freezer burn"?

  Why do they call it Pork and Beans when all you get is beans and a
piece of fat?

  Why do things that are bad for you taste good?

  Why do we call them French Fries when they were not invented in France?

  Why do we yell 'SOUPS ON' when calling everybody for dinner when most
of the time we have no intention of serving soup?

  Why do you get round from eating square meals?

  Why does a box of Instant-Jello say to chill for an hour?

  Why doesn't honey ever spoil?

  Why don't crackers ever break on the perforations?

  Why don't we have dessert at breakfast?

  Why is it called Grey Poupon when it's really yellow?

  Why is it considered unlucky to spill salt?

  Why is it that everytime someone eats something that tastes terrible
they immediately think the person next to them wants to see what it
tastes like too?

  Why is it that they put expiry dates on PRESERVATIVES?

  Why is it that we eat food up yet we down a drink?

  Why is ketchup (catsup) sold by weight and mayonnaise sold by volume?

  Why is there always a hair in your food and never in anyone else's?

  With all the preservation in processed food these days isn't it
comforting to know that most of it will outlive you?

Salutations from --Christchurch-+
  ICE-man in      /\            |          \ | /   Mountains, Sunshine
 New Zealand     /  \/\         |  /\      - O -   Forestry, Farming
-^-^-^-^-^-^-^-^/      \!!ii,,..@-/==\---^-^-^-^-^ Beaches and Surfing


... "Mr. Worf, fire phasers at Heather" ... Zzzzzap!

--- EzyBlueWave V2.01b005 00F90260
 * Origin: Milky Way, Langley, BC [604] 532-4367 (1:153/307)