Text 241, 76 rader
Skriven 2004-09-28 20:44:00 av George Pope
     Kommentar till en text av GREG SEARS
Ärende: Andy Rooney's tips
==========================
GS> AndyRooney's tips for fighting the telemarketers

I lost the file I once had of a game to play with telemarketers, that gives you
points for various ways of fighting them (1 pt for every minute wasting their
time with no intention to buy(2 pts if you get a supervisor on the line)

But I did get this one of Raven's funnies. . .
(on watchersweb.com)



"10 WAYS TO ENOY TELEMARKETERS"

Thanks to - BIGGS

      ******************************************************

10 Ways To Annoy Telemarketers
  
10. When they ask "How are you today?" Really tell them!
Example: "I'm so glad you asked because no one these days
seems to care, and I have all these problems; my arthritis is
acting up, my eyelashes are sore, my dog just died..." 
9. If they say they're John Doe from XYZ Company, ask them to
spell their name. Then ask them to spell the company name.
Then ask them where it is located. Continue asking them 
personal questions or questions about their company for as long as
necessary. If they ask why, tell them your attorney said to
make sure you got all that information for the law suit.
                                                     8. Again,
if they give their name, cry out in surprise, "Judy! Is that you? Oh
my Gosh! Judy, how have you been?" Hopefully, this will give
Judy a few brief moments of pause as she tries to figure out
where she could know you from. 
7. If MCI calls trying to get you to sign up for the Family
and Friends Plan, reply, in as SINISTER a voice as you can, "I
don't have any friends... Would you be my friend?"    
                             6. If they want to loan you
money, tell them you just filed for bankruptcy and you could sure 
use some money. 
5. Tell the telemarketer you are on "home incarceration" and
ask if they could bring you a case of beer and some chips. 
4. After the telemarketer gives their spiel, ask him/her to
marry you. When they get all flustered, tell them that you
could not possibly just give your credit card number to a 
complete stranger. 
3. Tell the telemarketer you are busy at the moment and ask
them if they will give you their HOME phone number so you can
call them back. When the telemarketer explains that they
cannot give out their HOME number, you say "I guess you don't want
anyone bothering you at home, right?" The telemarketer will
agree and you say, "Now you know how I feel!" Say good bye -
and hang up. 
2. Insist that the caller is really your buddy Leon, playing
a joke. "Come on Leon, cut it out! Seriously, Leon, how's your
mom?" 
And first and foremost: 
1. Tell them to talk VERY, VERY SLOWLY, because you want to
write EVERY WORD down so you can remember what they said. 
Print this list out and keep it by the phone. It really does
work. Do you friends a favor and e-mail them a copy too.



Your Moderator and all-round friend/servant,
<+]::-{(} ("Cyberpope")
Internet: gapope@vcn.bc.ca
1)If you don't like a joke, post 2-3 examples of what you DO like!
B)If you DO like a joke, say thank-you with 2-3 jokes of your own! :)

(I am the Bishop of ROM!)

... nfx v3.1 down at the end of Lonely Street...in Heartbreak Hotel....      

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