Text 2811, 109 rader
Skriven 2005-10-09 19:32:35 av George Pope (1:153/715.1275)
   Kommentar till text 2806 av Greg Sears (3:633/104)
Ärende: George Pope
===================
On (09 Oct 05) Greg Sears wrote to All...
 GS>                            WE CAN'T STAND AMERICANS

And why they can't much stand us, either!

 GS>  1. Because they come up here in the summer, wearing funny clothes
 GS> and carrying skis on the tops of their station wagons.

--because we go down there to Cali & Hawaii wearing silly flashy
tropical clothing nobody wears ANYWHERE!

 GS>  2. Because they never have anything but American money with them and
 GS> they never change it at a bank and they complain about the exchange
 GS> rate they get at stores.

--because we go down there with WEIRD coloured money and coins and
expect them to give us par value on these devalued units of money!

 GS>  3. Because they refuse to vote for Blue Jay or Expo ballplayers on
 GS> their All-Star Game ballots.

--because we do the same for ANYTHING & everything American

 GS>  4. Because of their tacky local newscasts in Buffalo and other crummy
 GS> border towns.

--because we understand the difference between Fahrenheit & Celcius when
watching newscasts, regardless of where they originate.

 GS>  5. Because they elect judges and have stupid TV commercials for them.

--because we let the cops make laws on-the-fly and enforce them against
even American tourists!

 GS>  6. Because they're used to getting their booze almost for free and
 GS> complain about our prices when they come here and we can't argue
 GS> because they're right.

--because we somehow have managed to fit an entire pitcher of beer into
a single can or bottle (or at least the alcohol of it!)

 GS>  7. Because their dollar is so high that it costs us a fortune to go
 GS> down there for a few days and take advantage of their cheap booze.

--because we whine & complain about our wimpy dollar

 GS>  8. Because they don't know the first thing about Canada, like who our
 GS> Prime Minister is -- or even that we have a Prime Minister or a
 GS> different currency.  And they glaze over if we try to explain them.

--because we know more about their country than THEY do and we aren't
afraid to rub it in at every opportunity.

 GS>  9. Because they don't even know that people like Lorne Greene,
 GS> William Shatner, Rich Little, and Monty Hall are Canadians.

--because we gave up these people because we didn't think they were
worth paying them more than we did, then we start complaining when they
recognize their potential value.

 GS> 10. Because the only time they pay attention to hockey is when they
 GS> win something.

--because we're the same way about baseball or basketball

 GS> 11. Because they make terrible weak beer and spend so much money
 GS> advertising it that every seventeen-year old in the western world
 GS> craves it.

--because one Canadian beer can affect you like your first shot of
heroin with instant addiction.

 GS> 12. Because before Vietnam they used to claim they'd never lost a war
 GS> even though we stuffed them in the War of 1812.

--because we burned their capital to the ground in 1812 & happily remind
them of it at every opportunity.

 GS> 13. Because they think Wayne Newton is a great entertainer.

--because we think it's worth bragging that Celine Dion & William
Shatner came from Canada

 GS> 14. Because, although we're their leading trading partner and share
 GS> the world's longest undefended border, they keep dropping cruise
 GS> missiles on obscure bits of Alberta.

--because we're pussies who would let Russia, in their commie
hey-day,walk right over us & into the USA.

 GS> 15. Because they still haven't seen though Ron and Nancy, and they
 GS> actually think that people like Teddy Kennedy are left-wing.

--huh?


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