Text 2847, 144 rader
Skriven 2005-10-23 08:40:07 av George Pope (1:153/715.1275)
Ärende: Canada! Yayy!
=====================
Damn fine country!  Why, you may ask?

I'm GLAD you asked!


            TOP REASONS  TO LIVE IN  BRITISH  COLUMBIA
            1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges.
            2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
            3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations.
            4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on.

            TOP REASONS  TO LIVE IN  ALBERTA
            1. Big Rock between you and B.C.
            2. Ottawa who?
            3. Tax is 7 per cent  instead of approximately 200 per cent for
the rest of the country.
            4. Flames vs. Oilers.
            5. Stamps vs. Eskies.
            6. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of.
            7. You live in the only province that could actually afford to
be its own country.
            8. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia
groups.

            TOP REASONS  TO LIVE IN  SASKATCHEWAN
            1. You  never run out of wheat.
            2. Cruise control takes on a whole new meaning.
            3. Your province is really easy to draw.
            4. You never have to worry about car roll-back if you have a
standard  transmission.
            5. It takes you two weeks to walk to your neighbor's house.
            6. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours.
            7. People will assume you live on a farm.
            8. Buying a huge John Deere mower makes sense.

            TOP REASONS  TO LIVE IN  MANITOBA
            1. You wake up one morning to find you suddenly have beachfront
property.
            2.  The only province to ever violently rebel against the
federal government.
            3. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes.
            4.  Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter.
            5. You don't  need a car, just take the canoe to work.
            6.  You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your
mood.
            7. Because of your licence plate, you are still friendly even
when you  cut someone  off.
            8. Pass the time watching trucks and barns float  by.

            TOP REASONS  TO LIVE IN  ONTARIO
            1. You live in the centre of the universe.
            2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump.
            3.  You and you alone decide who will win the federal election.
            4.  There's no such thing as an Ontario Separatist. Separate
from what?  You are the centre of the universe.
            5. The only province with hard-core American-style crime.
            6. Much Music's Speaker's Corner - rant and rave on national TV
for a dollar.

            TOP REASONS  TO LIVE IN  QUEBEC
            1. Racism is socially acceptable.
            2. The only province to ever kidnap federal politicians.
            3. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbor
will move out  next.
            4. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada .
            5. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo   *#!%".

            TOP REASONS  TO LIVE IN  NEW  BRUNSWICK
            1. One way or another, the  government gets 98 per cent of your
income.
            2. You're poor,  but not as poor as the Newfies.
            3. When listing the provinces, everyone forgets to mention
yours.
            4. The economy is based on fish, cows, and ferrying Ontario
motorists to Boston.
            5. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick.
            6. Everybody has a Grandfather who runs a lighthouse.
            7. Just as charming as Maine, but with more unemployed
fishermen.
            8. You probably live in a small seaside cottage with no
television.

            TOP REASONS  TO LIVE IN  NOVA SCOTIA

            1. Everyone can play the  fiddle.  The ones who can't, think
they can.
            2. You are the "only" reason Anne Murray makes money.
            3. You can pretend you have Scottish heritage as an excuse to
get drunk and  wear a kilt.
            4. The economy is based on lobster and fiddle music.
            5. Even though it smells like dead sea animals, Halifax is
considered Canada's most beautiful city.

            TOP REASONS  TO LIVE IN  PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND
            1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still
got the big, new  bridge.
            2. You can walk across the province in half an hour.
            3. You were probably once an extra on "Road to Avonlea".
            4.  This is where all those tiny red potatoes come from.
            5. The economy is based on fish, potatoes, and CBC TV shows.
            6.  Tourists arrive, see the "Anne of Green Gables" house, then
promptly leave.
            7. You can drive across the province in two minutes.
            8. It doesn't matter to you if Quebec separates.
            9. You don't share a border with the Americans, or with anyone
for that matter.
            10.  You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and
off at night.

            TOP REASONS  TO LIVE IN  NEWFOUNDLAND
            1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.
            2. In the rare case when someone moves to the Rock, you can make
them kiss dead cod.
            3. The economy is based on fish, seafood, and fish-related
products.
            4.  If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse.
            5. You and only you understand the meaning of Great Big Sea's
lyrics.
            6. The workday is about two hours long.
            7. You are credited with many great inventions, like the
solar-powered flashlight and the screen door for submarines.
            8. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders on your
wedding  day.

COME ON BY!!!
CANADA!!! The ONE AND ONLY!!!
Open 24 hours
Canadian money taken at par!



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