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Skriven 2005-10-23 07:11:34 av Greg Sears (3:633/104)
Ärende: Bone
============
.  o  _   From the Desk of Greg Sears AREA: F-UNNY
. Q\_|_)   --=[ I C E-man's FUNNY BONE Collection Book for ALL ]=--
. T> III                     Page: 08

                      Men's Restroom Etiquette


  Men should ace this test ... women may have a little difficulty.
  There IS a code of "Restroom Etiquette" that MUST be followed.
                                                .----------------.
  The following is the urinal configura-        ;----------------;
  tion in a sample men's room.  An "X"          | ~~ .------.    |
  above the number indicates "urinal is         |   /        \   |
  in use."  (Sample):                           |  |          |  |  ,---.
                                                |   \ ,    , /   |  |___|
       |   |   | x |   |   | x |                '---,########,---'  (---(
       | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 |                   /##'    '##\      )---)
       -------------------------                   |##,    ,##|     (---(
                                                    \'######'/       '---`
  (Indicates urinals 3 and 6 are occupied.)          \'----'/
                                                      |    |
  You are to identify correctly, based on           .-|    |-.
  urinal etiquette, at which stall you are     jgs /  '    '  \
  to stand.  Good luck!                            '----------'

  #1)  Easy

       |   | x |   | x |   |   |       (Urinals 2 and 4 occupied.)
       | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 |
       -------------------------        Your choice: ___

  #2)  Easy

       | x |   |   |   |   |   |       (Urinal 1 occupied.)
       | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 |
       -------------------------        Your choice: ___

  #3)  Kind of tricky

       |   |   |   |   |   |   |       (empty)
       | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 |
       -------------------------        Your choice: ___

  #4)  Kind of tricky

       |   | x |   | x |   | x |       (2, 4 and 6 occupied)
       | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 |
       -------------------------        Your choice: ___

  #5)  Subtle, tricky, but important to know

       |   | x |   |   | x | x |       (2, 5 and 6 occupied)
       | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 |
       -------------------------        Your choice: ___

  #6)  VERY tricky indeed

       | x | x |   |   | x | x |       (1, 2, 5 and 6 occupied)
       | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 |
       -------------------------        Your choice: ___

  Correct Answers:

  #1:  Stall 6        It's the ONLY one to go to and every guy instinc-
                      tively knows this.

  #2:  Stall 6        Stall 5 is acceptable, but you run a greater risk
                      of being next to someone who arrives later.

  #3:  Stall 1 or 6   You are tacitly saying, "I don't want anyone next
                      to me."

  #4:  Stall 1        You're stuck being next to at least ONE guy, so you
                      minimize the impact and get a wall on your left.
                      NEVER go between TWO guys if you can help it.
                      Exceptions to this are stadium restrooms where the
                      herd thunders in.

  #5:  Stall 4        Believe it or not, 1 and 3 "couples" you with the
                      guy in stall 2.  And we wouldn't want THAT now,
                      would we?  This differs from question 4 in such a
                      subtle way that the nuances cannot be explained.
                      Suffice to say, only we men would understand!

  #6: Stall - NONE! - You go to the mirror and pretend to comb your hair
                      or straighten a tie until the urinals "open up" a
                      bit more.  If you have to go REAL, REAL BAD, for
                      god's sake... use a doored stall!

  Other parts of the Unwritten Code of the Urinals:

    -- NO Talking, unless it's a good friend... but even then, keep
       it terse and unemotional.  This ain't no clubhouse.
    -- I don't think I need to tell you, absolutely NO touching of
       anyone other than yourself.  A touch of another's elbow is of
       the highest offense.
    -- NO Singing.  Period.
    -- Glances are for purposes of acknowledgment only..."Yeah, I see
       you there.  I will not look again".

         _                                                 _
        (_'------Suggest The Funny Bone To A Friend-------'_)
        (_.===============================================._)

 

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