Text 393, 150 rader
Skriven 2004-10-17 02:58:00 av Greg Sears (1:153/307)
     Kommentar till en text av George Pope
Ärende: Re: A Story
===================
Funny

 -=[05-Oct-2004 15:05, George Pope a beautiful sunny day in Christchurch]=-

 GS> But, with confidence, I put my arms into the bolsters, bent over and
   > pulled the bra down... but the boobs weren't cooperating. I'd no sooner
   > tuck one in a cup, and while placing the other, the first would slip out.
   > I needed a strategy. I bounced up and down a few times, tried to dribble
   > them in with short bunny hops, but that didn't work. So, while bent over,
   > I began rocking gently back and forth on my heel and toes, and I set'em
   > to swinging. Finally, on the fourth swing, pause, swing, and lift, I
   > captured the gliding glands.

 GP> Ahh, boobs, gotta love 'em!

  G-day George Pope, you may have seen these before.

(.)(.)                  Boobies

( . )( . )              Bigger Boobies

( O )( O )              Pamela Anderson-Lee boobies

(,)(,)                  Boobies with pierced nipples

  . .                   Very Little Boobies

( * )( * )              Implanted Boobies (very pert)

(   ) (   )             Nursing Mom boobies

(^)(^)                  Madonna Boobies

-<.><.>-                Teeny Bikini Boobies

--(.)(.)--              Regular Bikini Boobies

___( . )-( . )---       Mondo Bikini Boobies

x x                     No boobies

(/)(/)                  Feminist Boobies

()()                    Wonderbra Boobies


 GP> Bras, maybe not so much. . .

F unny that CyberPope...tell me how do YOU look in a bra? ;-)

> OBJoke: for our Moderator and all-round friend/servant

 A Brief History of Gravity

 It filled Galileo with mirth
 To watch his two rocks fall to Earth.
   He gladly proclaimed,
   "Their rates are the same,
 And quite independent of girth!"

 Then Newton announced in due course
 His own law of gravity's force:
   "It goes, I declare,
   As the inverted square
 Of the distance from object to source."

 But remarkably, Einstein's equation
 Succeeds to describe gravitation
   As spacetime that's curved,
   And it's this that will serve
 As the planets' unique motivation.

 Yet the end of the story's not written;
 By a new way of thinking we're smitten.
   We twist and we turn,
   Attempting to learn
 The Superstring Theory of Witten!
   (By Bruce Elliott)


> OBJoke: for Mr. <+]::-{(} ("Cyberpope")

   Thought I would reveal a little something 'bout myself. I am an
Experimental Horticulturist, working on a Feral Grant to help develop
cutting edge new food groups which can be grown by The Bored and
Otherwise Unoccupied in various cities (Your city was mentioned among
others, that is why I am telling you this groaner).

   It is felt that the opportunity to grow some of their own food might
just bring satisfaction to These Completely Useless Wretches in their
otherwise desperate lives. Growing soup was considered, but the idea
never did really cook except in 'Philly, the City of Broth_erly Love. It
wouldn't even wash in tony D.C.!

   Lately I am quite excited with the progress of my Pudding Project, and
through selective breeding have developed hybrid strains of pudding
which will grow in ordinary dirt. (Had to ditch 'Yogurt from Seeds',
required way too much culture.)

   There is nothing quite like wandering out into the garden of a summer
evening to gather a few home grown pudding pods for dessert, and with a
companion planting of non-dairy toppings nearby, I think we can claim a
parfait accompli'.

   My colleague Dr. Freud Rice has obtained funding which would put a
Pudding Garden in every major metropolitan area of the U.S. of A. by the
end of this year, which seems a little hasty, pudding-wise - but with a
little fancy footwork he consulted a Pudiatrist in New York - sheer
luck! . The good foot doctor has suggested using the heels of leftover
toast to fertilize the Bread Pudding crop, and has become one of our
arch supporters, raisin our hopes that we can help these loafers.

   Dr. Rice, a Professor of Appled Puddchology at Vanillanova, envisions
covering over the concrete pads on abandoned vacant lots, covering them
with mulch and sprinkling them over with instant pudding powder for a
quick and easy solution to the serious dessert problem in many inner
city Socially Anxious Yuppie neighborhoods. My good friend Fred (no
relation to Freud) thought of calling them 'Rice Paddies' in his honor -
catchy huh?

   But I digress. I encountered a lot of resistance to my research, in
fact almost every stage of the study turned into a creme' broulee'haha,
and not a few associates custard me out.

   However - I prevailed and my extensive experiments show that too much
rainwater dilutes the maturing pudding and a more concentrated liquid is
better assimilated.

   Butterscotch pudding, for example requires Chivas, or even a
Betterscotch. My field trials show using spirits keeps the flavor and
quality high - very high. Whoo-eee does it ever! Indeed Professor Rice
tested much of the current crop today and when the Prof was in the
pudding patch he said 'the proof is in the pudding!'

   But you have probably figured out that this is all nonsense, and I
confess that the spoof is in the pudding. (By Rose Katz)



     . . . . o o o o o
           _____      0
  ____====  ]OO|_n_n__][.
 [________]_|__|________)<   Cheers,
  oo    oo  'oo OOOO-| oo\_  I C E-man 
+--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--+--+

... Panties may not be the best thing on earth, but there next to it!­

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 * Origin: Milky Way, Langley, BC [604] 532-4367 (1:153/307)