Text 4624, 106 rader
Skriven 2006-08-30 11:18:00 av Greg Sears
     Kommentar till en text av George Pope
Ärende: Re: Wow
===============
     *  GEORGE POPE was entering F unny stuff to  GREG SEARS  *

 GS> Minnie was delighted and they left the counselor's
   > chambers. On the way downstairs she nudged Max, "Tell
   > me Max, how many times a week is semi-annually?"

 GP> He said, "Well, that'd be once annually, on Mondays, and once
   > cuntally, on Thursdays, and you can just blow me the other 5 days!

Minnie turned to Max with open lips.....blowing on Max! [;-)))

 > OBJoke: for our Moderator and all-round friend/servant


W E I R D  B U T  I T  H A P P E N E D


Some of these things sound like utter bullshit.  But I can assure you
that these things happened.  I have got these facts from several books
and newspapers so listen up:

Madame Lui, a French housewife, was murdered by her husband because she
burned his toast

A French restaurant owner killed himself when a delivery of fish didn't
arrive on time.

An American women ended up drinking so much water she couldn't breath
Everyone thought Anna Bochinsky was dead, but as she was being carried
to her funeral in an open coffin, she sat up and jumped out of it.
Unfortunately she ran into the road and was knocked down and killed.

Hungary has the highest suicide rate in Europe.

Charles Jean Baptiste Sanson was Chief Executioner in France when he was
only seven years old.

A French grocer killed his wife by stabbing her with a piece of cheese.

Frenchman Jacques Paszalefevre was determined to kill himself.  He tried
to hang himself, shoot himself, poison himself, all failed!  He then
jumped into the sea, but was rescued!  He died of exposure on his way to
hospital!

Hungarian stag hunter, Endre Bascany could imitate a stags mating call
so well that another hunter shot him!

An American women took her husbands ashes home, put them in her coffee
grinder and put the fine powder into an egg timer.

A Greek playwright, Aeschylus, was killed when a bird dropped a tortoise
on his head.

3,000 Indians in New Delhi die every year from drinking home-made
alcohol.

When King Mausolus died in 353 BC, his wife mixed the ashes with water
and drank the lot!

King Alexander of Greece was bitten by his pet monkey in 1920.  The
wound would not heal and the king died of blood poisoning a few days
later.

A Greek playwright called Philemon thought one of his own joked was so
funny that he died laughing at it.

A 98-year-old Greek philosopher killed himself when he hurt his little
finger.

Wild Bill Hickock, Al Jolson and Buster Keaton all died playing cards.

A Frenchman walked into a hospital, signed his body over to medical
research and shot himself.

Opera singer Leonard Warren had just sung the word "death" when he died
of a heart attack.

Two hundred sheep in Italy jumped into a river.  No one knew why.

In England during the nineteenth century, anyone who attempted suicide
and failed was liable to be hanged as punishment.  Not for failing, for
trying to kill themselves in the first place!

Henry Erskine went to answer a knock on the door one day in 1670, and
was astonished to see his wife there.  He'd just been to her funeral.

Many Russian noblemen resented the power that a humble monk, Rasputin,
held over the Tsar and his family.  they decided to kill him, but the
poison they out in his food failed.  The poison was strong enough to
kill five horses!  So, too, did the four bullets they fired into him,
and the many stab wounds they inflicted.  They eventually drowned him in
the river Neva.

After two years of constant hiccuping Heinze Isecke found a cure for
them. He threw himself out a high window and killed himself.

Cheers from,
  ICE-man      /\ Christchurch+          \ | /  Mountains, Sunshine
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