Text 533, 120 rader
Skriven 2004-11-13 18:52:00 av Greg Sears
     Kommentar till en text av GEORGE POPE
Ärende: F unny Story
====================
 BBS: Milky Way Dated: 11-11-04 (15:26) GEORGE POPE replied To: GREG SEARS
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GP>GS> "No, I'm sure she won't miss you," smirked the host, "but fifteen
  >GS> minutes ago.  She borrowed the extra bedroom."
  >GS>
  >GS> ***********************************************
  >GS> The author grants the right to forward and reproduce the above as long
  >GS> as the title and author's name are attached.

GP>Are you saying you wrote the above story? Because there was no other name
  >attached!

Why do you ask CyberPope...."You writin' a BOOK?" ;-)

OR

Are you using yer.... "moderatin' thing?" '-)

>OJ especially from you:

  Date: 15 Aug 99  07:27:00
  From: George Pope

I am minded of the English manor, where the
mistress had just hired a new house maid,
an Irish lass, straight out of the country.

The first day she was dusting in the Smoking
room where the Master of the house sat
reading.  On the mantel, she saw and dusted
a small bowl containing a couple of small
round white balls.  She, being curious and
not bashful, asked,
"What are these?"

He looked up, saw where she was pointing,
and answered, "Golf balls."

She said, "OH!", and went on dusting.

A few days later, she was dusting again in the
same room, where the master was again
reading.  Again, in the same bowl were small
white balls, only now there were four.  She
said, "I see you shot another Golf."


>OBJoke: from our Moderator and all-round friend/servant

  Date: 15 Aug 99  07:29:00
  From: George Pope

    A scientist named Walter invented a shrinking ray.

    He tried it on himself, and it worked. Unfortunately he couldn't
reverse the process, and he was stuck being the size of a normal man's
thumb. He had a loyal lab assistant who worked with him, though, so
his diminutive size didn't affect Walter's work too much.

    Still, after a while, Walter began to long for female companionship.
His lab assistant thought up a highly unethical plan. He planned to
get a couple of ladies of the night, shrink them down to Walter's
size, and keep them shrunk until they could figure out a way to
reverse the process.

    The lab assistant went to Times Square and tried to get the young
ladies, but it was trickier than it seemed. They were reluctant to
travel all the way to the lab, but the lab assistant offered to double
their usual rate, so they finally agreed.

    As soon as they stepped into the lab, the assistant turned on the
shrinking ray. There was a flash of light and a puff of smoke, and
when the air had cleared --- the prostitutes were exactly the same
size as they were before.

    "What's the big idea? Eek!" One of the prostitutes saw Walter
scurrying across the floor and squashed him flat with her shoe.

    Walter was dead, and the experiment was ruined.

    This was all because the lab assistant forgot what everyone already
knows: ... you can lead the whores to Walter, but you can't make 'em
shrink.


>OBJoke: from Mr. <+]::-{(} ("Cyberpope")

  Date: 15 Aug 99  07:34:00
  From: George Pope

    The newspaper editor was instructing the cub reporter in important
details of his calling.
    "Never state as a fact anything you are not absolutely sure about,"
said the editor.  "To avoid putting the paper in the position of stating
something which it may not be able to prove, you should always use the
words 'alleged,' 'claimed,' 'reputed,' 'rumored,' and so on, unless you
know positively that everything is true as stated."

    The cub was sent out to get society items, and soon thereafter the
following paragraph appeared in the society column:

    "It is rumored that a bridge party was given yesterday by a number
of reputed ladies.  Mrs. Smith, it is said, was hostess.  The guests,
it is alleged, with the exception of Mrs. Brown, who says that she comes
from illinois, were all local people.  Mrs. Smith claims to be the wife
of Alexander Smith, who is rumored to be doing a thriving business in
town."


>Cheers,            .:/
>                ,,///;,   ,;/
> I C E-man     o:::::::;;///
>              >::::::::;;\\\
> Still          ''\\\;,   ,;\
>       Fishing     `:\

 * SLMR 2.1a * A police state is great, so long as you're the police.

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