Text 973, 86 rader
Skriven 2005-01-28 09:46:14 av Greg Sears (1:153/307)
     Kommentar till en text av George Pope
Ärende: Re: I'm a Pope-Pusher..  14/2
=====================================
Funny on 27-Jan-2005 10:28

 GS> " I'm not surprised," snarled the first violinist,"You've been playing
   > like a cunt all night".

 -=[George Pope wrote IN a message to GREG SEARS]=-

 GP> At another concert, someone in the audience hollered out, "Second
   > Violinist is a motherfucker!"
[......]
   > all I want to know is who called that motherfucker a violin player?"

  G-day George Pope,

   A: it was his mother.........fucker! '-)

> OBJoke: for our Moderator and all-round friend/servant

       Telecommunications Dictionary.
Term               Definition.
-----              ---------------
Modem              What landscapers do to dem lawns.
Token Ring         A virtual engagement gift.
Ethernet           A device for catching the Ether Bunny.
DataPac            A size 14 girl in a size 8 bikini.
Asynch             A place to wash your hands.
Bisynch            The place where Elton John washes his
                    hands.
BBS                Tall tales told by insects that
                    produce honey.
ASCII              Ancient god of Telecommunications.
                   Rumored to give vast amounts of data to
                     believers. Hence, the phrase "ASCII and
                     you shall receive."
Block Parity       One heck of a good time.
Carrier Detect     Raison d'etre for premarital blood tests.
File Transfer      Procedure followed by INFORMATION CENTER
                     staff who are tired of their present
                     jobs.
Hayes Compatible   Prone to riding with a grizzled old
                     cowhand who sings off-key. Gene Autry is
                     the industry standard.
Serial Interface   A spoon.
Terminal Emulation   A function performed by a canary that
                     lays on its back with its legs in the
                     air.
XMODEM             A device on the losing end of an encounter with
                     lightning.


> OBJoke: for Mr. <+]::-{(} ("Cyberpope")

 Q U I C K L O S S D I E T

  Years of dieting had failed to return Betsy to the slim figure she
enjoyed as a youth. She had tried every diet known to man and women
kind.  So naturally when she heard there was a doctor new in town that
could help her loose weight she was very skeptical. But she was still
grossly overweight and desperate so she called at his office.
  He explained that any and all foods were allowed on his diet and in
any quantity. Also there was no exercise program involved in this diet
plan. And ... it was guaranteed with a 100% money back contract. She
will lose all the weight she wanted to.
  This all sounded too good to be true. There has to be a catch. Well of
course there was one aspect of the diet that was not pleasant. True you
can have all the food you desire, BUT you shove it up the rectum.
  Well she was desperate and agreed to the diet. Sure enough the fat
just melted away. Soon she was slim and trim. On her last visit,
concluding the treatment she seemed calm and relaxed but could not sit
still. She rocked gently from side to side continuously. The doctor was
getting a little worried and asked if there were any side effects. She
replied no.
  "Well then can you explain why you can't seem to sit still?"
  "Oh, that's nothing, Doc. I'm just chewing gum."


    .------------.
   / I C E-van|[0]\
   |  _       |_ice\ Cheers,
~ ~=-(@)------(@)-=/ I C E-man
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