Text 7354, 259 rader
Skriven 2008-08-25 13:08:00 av Bob Klahn (1:124/311)
Ärende: Dumbpublicans
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 TR> With apologies to Jeff Foxworthy, you just might be a
 TR> liberal if...

 TR> * You're sure the Constitution explicitly guarantees the
 TR> right to abortion and gay marriage, but not the right to
 TR> own a handgun.

 The word "handgun" does not appear in the constitution.

 TR> * You think Dan Quayle is the dumbest Vice-President we
 TR> ever had because he believed a flash card that misspelled
 TR> "potato," but think Obama is a genius despite the fact he
 TR> believes we have more than 57 states.

 He was dumb, whether he was the dumbest is not recorded.
 However, it had nothing to do with any flashcard.

 TR> * You'd be more upset about your favorite candidate being
 TR> endorsed by the NRA than the Communist Party.

 Certainly not, they are both extremists, but the NRA is actually
 in a position to do damage. Nobody pays attention to the
 communist party.

 TR> * You think the same criminals who use guns in the
 TR> commission of a crime will just hand them over to comply
 TR> with the law if guns are made illegal.

 You have to be a dumbdumb (double meaning intended) if you are
 this focused on guns.

 TR> * You know that 86% of all income taxes are paid by the top
 TR> 25% of income earners and you still feel that the rich
 TR> "aren't paying their fair share of the taxes."

 You are truly an economic dummy if you think focusing solely on
 income taxes constitutes a meaningful arguement. BTW, the top
 20% of the income earners earned about 50% of the income, and
 paid about 50% of the *TOTAL* taxes, before Bush started giving
 them tax breaks.

 TR> * You put a higher priority on oil pipelines possibly
 TR> inconveniencing a few caribou than you do on lowering the
 TR> price of gas for everyone in the country by drilling ANWR.

 You are an economic dummy if you think drilling ANWR is going
 to reduce prices significantly in the US.

 TR> * You're worried that Osama Bin Laden might not get a fair
 TR> trial if we capture him, but want George Bush thrown in
 TR> prison for being too zealous in protecting us from Al-Qaeda.

 If you think Bush has been zealous at all in protecting us from
 Al Qaeda you are too dumb to vote.

 TR> * You get infuriated when you hear about the CEO of a
 TR> Fortune 500 company making tens of millions of dollars, but
 TR> don't see a problem with an actor, basketball player, or
 TR> trial lawyer making the same amount.

 Everyone knows tens of millions of dollars is way to much for a
 lawyer. It's also way too much for an actor or basketball
 player, but since they actually have to perform and demonstrate
 that they are worth their pay everytime they step out on public,
 it's not near the problem.

 The Corporate CEO, OTOH, never gets his tens of millions
 paycheck for making life better for his employees. Other than
 his buddies on the board of directors. His job is to squeeze the
 employees as much as possible. That is the modern theory of
 business.

 TR> * You're constantly seeing subtle, coded racism in campaign
 TR> ads, but see nothing racist about blacks being promoted
 TR> over more qualified white applicants because of Affirmative
 TR> Action.

 Like Colin Powell, Clarence Thomas, and just about every black
 conservative? If you don't understand the meaning of the fact
 that 90% of the benefits of affirmative action go to white
 people, you are too ignorant to discuss the subject.

 TR> * You think it's obscene that oil companies are allowed to
 TR> make 8.3 cents per gallon in profit with gas prices this
 TR> high, but would never suggest cutting the 13 cents per
 TR> gallon they pay on taxes to reduce the price of gas.

 If you believe oil that sold for $60/bbl a couple years ago,
 isn't producing somewhere around $60/bbl in profit when the
 price doubles, you may have a problem with economic literacy.

 Unless you can actually show the price of pulling oil out of the
 ground has doubled in the last few years.

 TR> * You think George Bush is a chickenhawk because he wanted
 TR> to fight in Iraq and Afghanistan despite the fact that he
 TR> only served in the National Guard, but you don't think the
 TR> same about Barack Obama, who has never served in the
 TR> military and probably couldn't find either country on a map
 TR> without help.

 If you even suggest Bush *WANTED TO FIGHT* anywhere you are a
 fool. Bush did not want to fight in Afghanistan or Iraq, Bush
 wanted to send others to fight and bleed and die for oil in
 Iraq, after he prematurely pulled our people out of Afghanistan,
 and let Bin Laden get away.

 If you count being awol as the same as serving, you are worse
 than a fool. Bush's own campaign admitted he was absent for 6
 moonths, and there is another 6 months where his service cannot
 be verified. Bush skipped out on his service for a year, and
 dropped himself from pilot duty with no authorization
 whatsoever.

 TR> * You think protesting outside of abortion clinics is
 TR> extremism and should be illegal, but carrying around giant
 TR> puppet heads while wearing a t- shirt that compares Bush to
 TR> Hitler is just exercising your First Amendment rights.

 If you think anyone of any significance thinks protesting
 abortion should be illegal you are smoking the funny weed.

 TR> * You think the case for global warming is proven without a
 TR> shadow of a doubt, but that we need another century or two
 TR> worth of evidence to figure out if capitalism and free
 TR> markets work better than socialism.

 Anyone who thinks anything in science is proven without a doubt
 knows nothing about science.

 And anybody who thinks either capitalism or socialism is perfect
 knows nothing about economics.

 TR> * You believe the best way to fix the government screwing
 TR> something up in the market is with...drumroll,
 TR> please...more government intervention.

 If you believe removing government regulation has improved the
 energy systems, or the banking systems, you must be one of the
 parasites who profited from the Enron Fraud, and got out in time
 to keep your profits. Or you could be a perpetrator of the
 banking frauds, who managed to get away with it.

 TR> * You think the first thing we should have done when Russia
 TR> invaded Georgia was to take the matter to the United
 TR> Nations, where Russia sits on the UN Security Council.

 If you think there is anything else bush can do about it that
 will actually accomplish anything, you must be advocating
 national suicide.

 Of course, Bush could requalify as a jet fighter pilot, and go
 over there and shoot up some Russians.

 TR> * You spend your days criticizing the use of private jets,
 TR> SUVS, and luxurious houses that consume enormous amounts of
 TR> resources and then ride in an SUV to the airport, get on
 TR> your private plane, and fly home to your luxurious house.

 Now you are saying John McCain is a liberal? Oh, wait. Which of
 his seven houses are you talking about flying his private jet
 to?

 TR> * You have more nice things to say about countries like
 TR> Cuba and France than you do about your own country.

 Oh, that's Bush, when he talks about Gitmo, or the new
 administration in France.

 TR> * You think the war in Iraq is unwinnable, but victory in
 TR> the war on poverty is going to happen any day now if we can
 TR> just get the Democrats back in charge.

 Both of which happen to be true, if you are talking about *US*
 winning the war in Iraq. Oh, and you got it slightly wrong about
 the war on poverty. To be true, you would say victory in teh war
 on poverty is *POSSIBLE* if we get the democrats back in charge.

 Never underestimate the ability of the republicans to sabatoge a
 good thing.

 TR> * You won't even support English as our national language,
 TR> but can't seem to understand why people worry about tens of
 TR> millions of illegal aliens changing our culture.

 Now you are talking about George W. Bush.

 TR> * You think censorship is absolutely wrong; except when
 TR> it's applied to conservatives on college campuses or on
 TR> talk radio via the fairness doctrine.

 If you know so little about the fairness doctrine you are too
 ignorant to discuss this.

 TR> * You get more upset about an American soldier accidentally
 TR> killing a civilian than you do about a terrorist
 TR> deliberately blowing up a school bus full of kids.

 There is an old Jewish saying, If you save one life it's as if
 you have saved the entire world.

 The teaching of Christianity say, the terrorist who blows up a
 school bus full of kids will burn in the same hell as the
 american soldier who murders a woman, and her family, after
 raping the woman. Or the Jewish soldiers who kill a couple
 children because they are standing somewhere they think is
 suspicious. Or the American helicopter crew who kill three Iraqi
 farmers in a field, from a mile away, because they have some
 unidentifiable object in their hands.

 TR> * You think Fox News is hopelessly biased to the right, but
 TR> MSNBC, CNN, NBC, ABC, and CBS call it right down the middle.

 No, all the major media are tilting to the right these days.

 TR> * You think the real hero of the Cold War was Mikhail
 TR> Gorbachev.

 Nope, it was Lyndon Bains Johnson, and Harry Truman, and JFK,
 and even DD Eisenhower and RM Nixon. But the key player was LBJ, even though
 I doubt even he knew it at the time.

 TR> * You couldn't care less about what Americans in states
 TR> like Kansas or Virginia think of you, but you would be
 TR> greatly upset if a Frenchman gave you a dirty look because
 TR> you're an American.

 Why would anyone care what Americans in states like Kansas or
 Virginia think about them? Or do you actually think all
 Americans in Kansas and Virginia think exactly alike?

 TR> * You think kids in public schools should have to watch
 TR> Earth in the Balance and read Heather Has Two Mommies, but
 TR> no piece of literature with the word "Jesus" on it should
 TR> be allowed within a hundred yards of a school.

 I have never seen or heard of "Heather Has Two Mommies" in any
 public school in this part of Ohio. Earth in the Balance may be
 worth seeing, I haven't, so I wouldn't know.

 I do know it is perfectly legal to teach about religion in
 public schools, as long as you are not teaching religion. If you
 don't understand the difference you aren't bright enough to
 discuss this further.

 TR> About The Author

 TR> John Hawkins is a professional blogger who runs
 TR> Conservative Grapevine and Right Wing News.

 Ah, such high qualifications.


BOB KLAHN bob.klahn@sev.org   http://home.toltbbs.com/bobklahn

... An ignorant person is one who doesn't know what you have just found out.
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