Text 9452, 54 rader
Skriven 2006-12-21 21:52:07 av Kurt Ullman (12864.babylon5)
     Kommentar till en text av rec.arts.sf.tv.babylon5.moderated
Ärende: Wanted to make sure you had time to run this past your attorney
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Christmas Cookie Liability and Indemnification Agreement


Santa Claus, AKA Kris Kringle, AKA Jolly Old St. Nick (hereinafter 
referred to as "Santa") acknowledges receipt of Christmas cookies from 
______________________ (hereinafter referred to as "Baker").

Santa acknowledges and understands that no warranty, either expressed or 
implied, is made by Baker as to the nutritional content of cookies. This 
document is offered to duly warn Santa that dangerous conditions, risks, 
and hazards may result from over-consumption of cookies. Santa is hereby 
informed that cookies may contain any of the following: calories, 
carbohydrates, sodium (salt), fat, saturated fat, trans fat, 
polyunsaturated fat, monounsaturated fat, nuts, sugar, caffeine, and 
good cheer. Santa acknowledges that eating way too many cookies may 
incur risks including, but not limited to, satiation, indigestion, heart 
burn, dizziness, laziness, heart disease, holiday spirit, "food coma," 
and "that bloated feeling."

As consideration for accepting Baker's cookies, Santa indemnifies Baker 
from all liability for injury or other harm (including obesity) which 
may be caused, in whole or in part, by said "too many" cookies. Santa 
agrees that neither he, nor his heirs or personal representatives will 
sue Baker for any injury suffered, in whole or in part, as a consequence 
of binging on cookies. Santa assumes full responsibility and will 
indemnify Baker for any damages in the event that he transfers cookies 
to any third party (including, but not limited to, potential claimants 
Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen, Rudolph, 
Mrs. Claus, and various elves).

This indemnification includes an agreement not to haul Baker into court 
on the basis of:

   1. Failure to provide nutrition information and a list of ingredients 
(the "Grandma's secret recipe" clause);
   2. Failure to caution of the potential for overeating because cookies 
taste too good and are provided at no cost;
   3. Failure to advise that walking, biking, and jogging will shed 
pounds, but riding around on a sleigh will not;
   4. Failure to warn that Christmas lights, lawn ornaments (plastic 
reindeer, snowmen, etc.) and other holiday decorations may constitute 
manipulative marketing to lure Santa into over-consumption.
   5. Failure to offer "healthier" cookie alternatives (e.g., tofu bars);
   6. Failure to counsel that cookies may be habit-forming and/or 
irresistible; and
   7. Failure to notify that eating way too many cookies may lead to 
even greater levels of obesity for St. Nick (the "Sanity Clause").

SANTA HAS READ THIS DOCUMENT AND UNDERSTANDS IT. SANTA IS SIGNING IT 
FREELY AND VOLUNTARILY.

SANTA: ___________________________ DATE:__________________
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