Text 32689, 155 rader
Skriven 2006-06-27 18:22:00 av Nathan Prugh
     Kommentar till en text av Ward D.
Ärende: Taking sides
====================
hey Ward, here is a joke for you from George Pope. HEHEHE



---------------------------- <Original Message> ----------------------------

   Date:  6-27-2006
   From: GEORGE POPE (1:153/715.1275)
     To: SYSOP
Subject: Taking sides

On (26 Jun 06) Nathan Prugh wrote to Ward Dossche...
 NP> Good canidate for the funny echo! LOL

Yup, lawyers make good fodder for funny!


A most extraordinary trial is going on in the High Court in London at the
moment in which a man named Chrysler is accused of stealing more than 40,000
coat hangers from hotels round the world. He admits his guilt, but in his
defence he claims that well, perhaps it would be simpler just to send you a
brief extract from the trial. We join the case at the point where Chrysler
has just taken the stand.

Counsel: What is your name?

Chrysler: Chrysler. Arnold Chrysler.

Counsel: Is that your own name?

Chrysler: Whose name do you think it is?

Counsel: I am just asking if it is your name.

Chrysler: And I have just told you it is. Why do you doubt it?

Counsel: It is not unknown for people to give a false name in court.

Chrysler: Which court?

Counsel: This court.

Chrysler: What is the name of this court?

Counsel: This is No 5 Court.

Chrysler: No, that is the number of this court. What is the name of this
court?

Counsel: It is quite immaterial what the name of this court is!

Chrysler: Then perhaps it is immaterial if Chrysler is really my name.

Counsel: No, not really, you see because...

Judge: Mr Lovelace?

Counsel: Yes, m'lud?

Judge: I think Mr Chrysler is running rings round you already. I would try a
new line of attack if I were you.

Counsel: Thank you, m'lud.

Chrysler: And thank you from ME, m'lud. It's nice to be appreciated.

Judge: Shut up, witness.

Chrysler: Willingly, m'lud. It is a pleasure to be told to shut up by you. For
you, I would....

Judge: Shut up, witness. Carry on, Mr Lovelace.

Counsel: Now, Mr Chrysler for let us assume that that is your name you are
accused of purloining in excess of 40,000 hotel coat hangers.

Chrysler: I am.

Counsel: Can you explain how this came about?

Chrysler: Yes. I had 40,000 coats which I needed to hang up.

Counsel: Is that true?

Chrysler: No.

Counsel: Then why did you say it?

Chrysler: To attempt to throw you off balance.

Counsel: Off balance?

Chrysler: Certainly. As you know, all barristers seek to undermine the
confidence of any hostile witness or defendant. Therefore it must be equally
open to the witness, or defendant, to try to shake the confidence of a
hostile barrister.

Counsel: On the contrary, you are not here to indulge in cut and thrust with
me. You are only here to answer my questions.

Chrysler: Was that a question?

Counsel: No.

Chrysler: Then I can't answer it.

Judge: Come on, Mr Lovelace! I think you are still being given the run-around
here. You can do better than that. At least, for the sake of the English bar,
I hope you can.

Counsel: Yes, m'lud. Now, Mr Chrysler, perhaps you will describe what reason
you had to steal 40,000 coat hangers?

Chrysler: Is that a question?

Counsel: Yes.

Chrysler: It doesn't sound like one. It sounds like a proposition which
doesn't believe in itself. You know, "Perhaps I will describe the reason I
had to steal 40,000 coat hangers ... Perhaps I won't ... Perhaps I'll sing a
little song instead...."

Judge: In fairness to Mr Lovelace, Mr Chrysler, I should remind you that
barristers have an innate reluctance to frame a question as a question. Where
you and I would say, "Where were you on Tuesday?", they are more likely to
say, "Perhaps you could now inform the court of your precise whereabouts on
the day after that Monday?". It isn't, strictly, a question, and it is not
graceful English but you must pretend that it is a question and then answer
it, otherwise we will be here for ever. Do you understand?

Chrysler: Yes, m'lud.

Judge: Carry on, Mr Lovelace.

Counsel: Mr Chrysler, why did you steal 40,000 hotel coat hangers, knowing as
you must have that hotel coat hangers are designed to be useless outside hotel
wardrobes?

Chrysler: Because I build and sell wardrobes which are specially designed to
take nothing but hotel coat hangers.



Your Moderator and all-round friend/servant,
<+]::-{(} ("Cyberpope")
Internet: gapope@vcn.bc.ca
1)If you don't like a joke, post 2-3 examples of what you DO like! B)If you DO
like a joke, say thank-you with 2-3 jokes of your own! :) My Preferred Netmail
address is: 1:153/715.1275
ICQ UIN: 32617950

(I am the Bishop of ROM!)

--- PPoint 1.76
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