Text 9117, 50 rader
Skriven 2007-12-30 16:02:28 av Björn Forsström (2:203/614.61)
   Kommentar till text 9079 av Ward Dossche (2:292/854)
Ärende: Cats
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DD>> How many were killed on the roads there this year?

 WD> People do not get killed in Sweden by cars, didn't you know?

Oh, they do. 25 more than last year although they have been working
hard towards a 0-vision.

 WD> They have now chips in everything. In people, in dogs, in cat, in moose,
 WD> in cars, in potatoes, in beer .... everything.

Interesting....

 WD> All of it is continuously controlled by a giant computer from a guy's
 WD> garage in Saeve.

hmm....

 WD> The chips in food do not digest but in fact stay functional throughout the
 WD> whole digestive system. It is used to monitor digestion, see how much shit
 WD> that can be expected, observe methane production and various things.

Everything eatable with EAN code that starts with 400 to 440 have been shown
to be the best to produce methane.

 WD> The methane-production is monitored to make certain that Swedes do not
 WD> fart anymore. When there's too much build-up the central computer will
 WD> trigger an alarm and the special MRU, "Methane Response Unit", will come
 WD> rushing with a truck and a crew which will push a tube up that particular
 WD> Swedes ass to suck all methane from that person's bowels. This has made
 WD> Sweden famous in the world as "the country where not a single fart is
 WD> lost".

Obviously you haven't heard about the Conti-Scan tube between Sweden
and Denmark and when that doesn't work it's just to take the ferry between
Göteborg and Fredrishavn.

 WD> Anyway, I'm deviating too much, the conveor belt collects all shit from
 WD> Sweden and transports it via an ingenious system of larger conveyor belts
 WD> to a secret location somewhere in the country where nobody ever goes.

Now I can let you in on that secret.
It's going to Norway.

 WD> Anyway, I could tell horror stories about chips in Swedish beer,

I didn't even knew we made beer here, thought that catpiss was imported
from Germany.

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 * Origin: . (2:203/614.61)