Text 13706, 110 rader
Skriven 2011-01-21 02:09:51 av Richard Webb (1:116/901.0)
  Kommentar till text 13705 av Roy Witt (1:387/22)
Ärende: Welcome to the 21st century in a supposedly civilized country
=====================================================================
Hi ROy,

On Thu 2039-Jan-20 15:59, Roy Witt (1:387/22) wrote to Richard Webb:

 Roy>> 1969, the same afternoon after seeing the movie; Easy Rider.

 RW> <rotflmao>  That was a big year for learning.

Roy> More than that, it was a year of lost innocence for me. Hell, when I
Roy> left the dinky town in the midwest for the big world, I was so naive
Roy> I didn't know there were homosexuals in large quantities. I had to
Roy> experience their (male and female) presence in a bar I frequented
Roy> upon arrival in San Diego to know about them. I sure wanted to get
Roy> aquainted with that cute little blond I saw there, but I was told
Roy> that the butch she was with would rip my balls off if I tried.

<rotfl> REcall that, from about the same time.  WAs a bit
younger but did the traveling show for the summers with
bandleader signing the papers for both Musicians' union and
my parents saying he'd be responsible for my conduct and
proper behavior <yeah right>.

<snip>

 RW>> YEp, that was my basic m.o. after second marriage went
 RW>> south, but the partying was much more controlled then.  By
 RW>> that time I had kids in high school though, and about the
 RW>> time I'd look like I'd possibly go completely off the rails
 RW>> I'd get a kid dumped on me for awhile <grin>.

 Roy>> Hate it when that happened. Gave them 50 cents each and sent them
 Roy>> to the movies.

 RW> YEp, but when they came to stay a little more difficult to
 RW> do all the time <grin>.

Roy> Mine were staying with their god-parents as we were in a custody
Roy> battle. Either one of us could visit there, but couldn't remove the
Roy> kids. My ex said that she'd be moving back to the midwest and I
Roy> relented with the judges prodding, and allowed her to take them with
Roy> her. Her dad and his new wife (my former landlady) became the new
Roy> custodians and I trusted both of them.

Similar sort of situation, except I'm on the road all the
time and my parents were the custodians at least in the
girls' younger years.  THen they went back to their mother
and some things happened to the girls that we won't go into
here, but suffice it to say my parents stepped in so there
wouldn't be extreme bloodshed.  IT was a zoo, with one kid
eventually going back to her mother's after mother's second
husband was out of the picture, I would at least permit them to stay at their
mother's once he was gone.  YOungest went
back, some disciplinary issues, my parents said no more, so
she came to stay with me.

 RW>> Makes one pull back a bit, because "do as I say not as I do" didn't
 RW>> work with me as a kid either,
<snip>

 Roy>> Out of site, out of mind here.

 RW> YEp, but one thing I tried to reinforce, if it's dangerous,
 RW> i.e. your friend is under the influence we'll get you home
 RW> safe one way or another, and we'll pass on any discussion
 RW> until later.

Roy> I didn't see mine on a regular basis until 1980. By then they were
Roy> nearly adults with their mother's ideas drummed into their heads. My
Roy> son ran away from home and ended up in California that year, living
Roy> with me. I made him finish highschool and offered to send him
Roy> through college at my expense, but he opted to work at Burger King
Roy> and live with his girlfriend. His choice came back to bite him in
Roy> the arse and she ended up putting him through school.

YEp, they live and learn.  YOungest one never did pick up on it, she moved out
on her own, eldest got into some bad
situations and ended up with me, and I made that offer too,
but she took up with a boyfriend instead.  OH well.  IT
hasn't been easy for the kids either with all this.  Eldest
is finally settling down to a stable lifestyle, she's got
some health problems, but she trains service dogs.  YOungest
... I don't know, I worry a lot about her, but there's not a thing I can do for
her.  My parents have her son, and he's a sophomore in high school this year. 
AT least he's got a
stable safe environment.

 RW> I endeavored to be one of those parents that used reason with my
 RW> kids.  IN some ways it worked rather well, then there were the other
 RW> times when it didn't.  <oh well>  Water under the bridge and all
 RW> that.

Roy> I tried that and was successfull with it with step-kids, especially
Roy> one of them. I took over his punishment when his mother broke
Roy> several veins in her hand while giving him a spanking. If she didn't
Roy> hit him so hard, she wouldn't have done that. I used a rolled up
Roy> newspaper on my desk behind closed doors, pinching his ass so he'd
Roy> have at least one tear in his eye and let him yell and scream to
Roy> make it sound real, before letting him out of the room. I guess he
Roy> gained a whole lot of respect for me, as he's still in touch today.

Kathy's were already grown by the time we hooked up.  HEr
grandkids figured out quickly though that Richard would
endeavor to be fair, but Richard would only say no, or cease and desist once.



Regards,
           Richard
--- timEd 1.10.y2k+
 * Origin:  (1:116/901)