Text 1478, 93 rader
Skriven 2005-03-29 11:42:30 av George Pope (1:153/307.11)
   Kommentar till text 1476 av James Bradley (1:134/77.0)
Ärende: Barking Dog
===================
On (29 Mar 05) James Bradley wrote to George Pope...
 JB>  GP> and the most behaved jokes forum in all of cyberspace!
 JB>
 JB> ... But It's *how* you behave! <GD+RRRR>

Is that like "if it warn't for bad luck, I wouldn't have no luck at
all"?

 JB>  GP> Oh dang, wait til I cancel my internet then rub it in with some
 JB> funny
 JB>  GP> sites I've not heard of yet! :P
 JB>
 JB> Don't tell me I was an influence?

No?  Why would you think so?

 JB> The svelte pencil pusher, while shaking uncontrollably in his prison
 JB> issue slippers, thinks this might be his chance to procure the 'top
 JB> bunk', and timidly asks, "I-I-If it wouldn't b-b-be to much tr-tr-tr-
 JB> problem, cou-cou-could I be the Daddy?"
 JB>
 JB> With a wry grin, the tattooed hardened criminal agrees, "Sure Daddy.
 JB> Now get on your knees and give Mommy a blow-job!"

Now THAT is a scene they should've used in every "Scared Straight"
program!

And that would've been the end of juvenile delinquency!

 JB> 67              Napping, dreaming of sex

I take it you're 67?

More on the evils of drinking. . .


"An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk in order to spend
time with his friends." Ernest Hemingway
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading." Henny
Youngman
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not."
Stephen Wright
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we
fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven.
Sooooo, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!" Brian O'Rourke
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." Benjamin
Franklin
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
BEER: HELPING UGLY PEOPLE HAVE SEX SINCE 3000 B.C.!!! "Genesis"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drink I feel ashamed.
Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery
and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they
might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to
myself, "It is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come
true than be selfish and worry about my liver." Jack Handy
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I once mixed water with whiskey and had a very bad hangover. Now I've
given up drinking water.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Well ya see, Norm, it's like this...A herd of buffalo can only move as
fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the
slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural
selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and
health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the
weakest members.

"In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the
slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills
brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain
cells first. In his way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the
weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient
machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."


Your Moderator and all-round friend/servant,
<+]::-{(} ("Cyberpope")
Internet: gapope@vcn.bc.ca
1)If you don't like a joke, post 2-3 examples of what you DO like!
B)If you DO like a joke, say thank-you with 2-3 jokes of your own! :)
My Preferred Netmail address is: 1:153/307.11
ICQ UIN: 32617950

(I am the Bishop of ROM!)


--- PPoint 1.76
 * Origin: Cyberpope pointing via the Milky Way! (1:153/307.11)