Text 2648, 104 rader
Skriven 2005-09-26 08:37:24 av George Pope (1:153/715.1275)
   Kommentar till text 2629 av Greg Sears (3:633/104)
Ärende: Camel vs Elephant
=========================
On (25 Sep 05) Greg Sears wrote to George Pope...
 GS>  GP> When the motorist got home, he put the sparrow in a cage,
 GS>    > leaving him some bread and water inside. When the sparrow
 GS>    > came to, he looked around and said: "Bars, bread, water...
 GS>    > Oh my God!! I have killed the motorist!!!"
 GS>
 GS> It's gotto be Canada, cause I've heard the birds can speak there!! '-)

You don't have pet parrots, cockatiels, etc. Down Under?
We don't have any native talking birds here in Canada!

But a parrot can make a great watchdog! (usually!)


 A guy decides that maybe he'd like to have a pet and goes to a pet shop.
 After looking around he spots a parrot sitting on a little perch.  It
 doesn't have any feet or legs.  The guy says out loud, "Geez, I wonder
 what
 happened to this parrot?"

 The parrot answers the guy's question, "I was born this way.  I'm a
 defective parrot."

 "Ha, ha," the guy laughs.  "It sounded like this parrot actually
 understood
 what I said and answered me."

 "I understood every word," says the parrot.  "I am a highly intelligent,
 thoroughly educated bird."

 "Oh, yeah?" the guy asks.  "Then answer this: how do you hang onto your
 perch without any feet?"

 "Well," the parrot says, "this is a little embarrassing, but since you
 asked I'll tell you.  I wrap my little parrot penis around this wooden
 bar,
 like a little hook.  You can't see it cause of my feathers."

 "Wow," says the guy, "you really can understand and answer, can't you?"

 "Of course.  I speak both Spanish and English.  I can converse with
 reasonable competence on almost any subject: politics, religion, sports,
 physics, philosophy ... and I am especially good at ornithology.  You
 ought
 to buy me.  I  am a great companion."

 The guy looks at the price tag. $200.  He says.  "I can't afford that."

 "Pssst," the parrot hisses, motioning the guy over with one wing.
 "Nobody
 wants me cause I don't have any feet.  You can get me for $20, just make
 an
 offer."

 The guy offers 20 dollars and walks out with the parrot.  Weeks go by.
 The
 parrot is sensational.  He's funny, he's interesting, he's a great pal,
 he
 understands everything, sympathizes, gives good advice.  The guy is
 delighted.
 One day the guy comes home from work and the parrot says, "Pssst," and
 motions him over with one wing.  The guy goes up close to the cage.  "I
 don't know if I should tell you this or not," says the parrot, "but it's
 about your wife and the mailman..."

 "What?" says the guy.  "What?"

 "Well," the parrot says, "when the mailman came to the door today your
 wife
 greeted him in a sheer nightgown and kissed him on the mouth."

 "What happened then?" asks the guy.  "Then the mailman came into the
 house
 and lifted up the nightgown and began petting her all over," reports the
 parrot.

 "My God!!" the guy says.  "Then what?"

 "Then he lifted up the nightgown, got down on his knees and began to
 lick
 her body, starting with her breasts slowly going down and down..."

 The parrot pauses for a long time ...  "What happened?  What happened?"
 says the frantic guy.

 "I don't know," says the parrot, "My pecker got hard and I fell off my
 perch."




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