Text 285, 96 rader
Skriven 2006-03-04 21:54:24 av Ardith Hinton (1:153/716.0)
    Kommentar till text 267 av James Bradley (1:134/77.0)
Ärende: Invisible Handicaps
===========================
Hi, James!  Recently you wrote in a message to Ardith Hinton:

[re medication for pain cf. medication for mental illness]
AH>  Yes... I remember that you didn't like it when others kept
AH>  trying to force pain medication on you, and I don't like
AH>  it when they do that to me either!

JB>  You know... I didn't even equate the two!


          That's my NT (preferred reasoning style).  I tend to see similarities
where others don't.  Thankyou for being receptive to the idea....  :-)



JB>  If only that $25 placebo pill would do the job, I'd go
JB>  broke. <G>


          Me too....  :-)



JB>  I ran into a snarky clerk two days ago. I try not to
JB>  burden someone when they ask how I am. Trying to pass
JB>  it off, in that "I don't like to complain." the wench
JB>  said "Good!" and walked away.


          Sheesh....



JB>  Admittedly, my attempt to keep the air frivolous wasn't
JB>  going too well, but I wonder what she would have done if
JB>  I let loose with my top ten? <EG> I know the lady likely
JB>  has a child/relative with a physical malady, and the
JB>  invisible handicap is one she will never sympathize with


          Could be.  Another possibility, however, is that the lady also has an
invisible handicap... a lack of emotional intelligence or something.  I used to
wonder about people who said "how-are-you-that's-good" without giving the other
person time to respond.  I didn't feel they really cared how I was.  Then there
was the GP who, at an office appointment, asked "How are you?"  I said I'd been
hoping he could tell me.  The look on his face was priceless... [chuckle].

          I've since learned that many people, especially those whose preferred
reasoning style is SJ, like to have a script to follow.  When they say "How are
you?" and you say "Fine," they know what's expected of them.  Even if you don't
answer in the conventional way... or don't answer at all... they'll often go on
to the next line in their script.  Alternatively, they may take offence at what
you said because they feel threatened by any deviation from the script....  :-/



AH>  Regarding your mother's friend, I doubt any serious harm
AH>  was done... you obviously meant your comment as a joke.

JB>  Sorry, but I lost the train on this one.


          Here it is....

 >>  I don't live in the best neighbourhood, and was explaining
 >>  to her some of the idiocy I see around here. She asked if
 >>  there were any reasonable individuals near me. I got out
 >>  through the laughter, "Everybody's crazy but me."

 >>  Of course, I said so in jest, but maybe I shouldn't. I just
 >>  meet up with an old friend that *is* on that kick, AND she
 >>  was hospitalized a few times due to mental illness.



JB>  I'll bite...

JB>  Do you think a persons' pride often keeps them from
JB>  acknowledging their own foibles?


          In a word... yes!  I suspect a lot may also have to do with reasoning
styles, however.  Some people consider it rude & selfish to use the word "I" or
to acknowledge feelings of one's own but see nothing wrong with making negative
judgements about others.  That may be the way they were taught to think, and if
they seem content with it their brains may be wired the same way... or they may
find it convenient because it enables them to feel superior to others.  I guess
it's easier for them to say "You're crazy!" & "That's stupid!" than to admit to
what they don't know or don't understand.  But I find being able to acknowledge
one's own foibles & suchlike a crucial step in the process of learning....  :-)




--- timEd/386 1.10.y2k+
 * Origin: Wits' End, Vancouver CANADA (1:153/716)