Text 373, 85 rader
Skriven 2006-07-30 15:42:07 av Ardith Hinton (1:153/716.0)
    Kommentar till text 371 av James Bradley (1:134/77.0)
Ärende: The World Turns...  1.
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Hi, James!  Recently you wrote in a message to Ardith Hinton:

AH>  Like you, however, I make a distinction between
AH>  "fragile" and "insecure".  An example of the former
AH>  might be the modem buddy who is easily thrown into
AH>  a loop by the use of words such as "argument"
AH>  regardless of the context.

JB>  Their exposure to "arguments" may be more traumatic
JB>  than you or I are used to.


         Uh-huh.  An argument can simply be a reason offered in favour of doing
something, or an exchange of opinion.  Even when the exchange becomes heated...
i.e. how the majority of folks seem to interpret the word... it can be resolved
in a manner satisfactory to both parties.  I learned that from my parents.  But
other folks, going by different examples, might easily feel threatened....  :-/



JB>  Like a puppy that cowers when someone raises their
JB>  hand/voice...


         Or an animal which has just been hit by a car, for example, then turns
on the human beings who are trying to help.  Years ago Dallas & I had a dog who
was abused by her previous owner.  She cowered when I held anything in front of
& just above her head, and she panicked when the clothesline squeaked.  She got
over it in time, though, especially after I added a mineral supplement....  :-)



JB>  Those are incidences beyond our control, and perhaps
JB>  those scars are the ones that will never heal.


         Well... as with physical scars, emotional scars develop naturally in a
previously wounded area.  The scar tissue may be stronger in some ways than the
original, but it's also more rigid & resistant to further healing.  Where there
is some hypersensitivity it is possible that healing is still ocurring or could
be if the person concerned is amenable to change.  The individual who goes into
fight-or-flight mode whenever they encounter something which reminds them of an
event in the past can learn to handle such situations differently.  However, it
is difficult & painful work which not everyone is willing to undertake....  :-)



JB>  Too bad they ever are inflicted, but it aint a
JB>  perfect world, is it?


         Agreed.  However... as somebody in another echo pointed out awhile ago
... we live in a world of opposites, and maybe that's how we learn best.  If we
had no such problems we wouldn't know when we were relatively well off....  :-)



AH>  OTOH, I couldn't care less what Nora's teachers wear
AH>  if they can relate to Nora's viewpoint.  The problem
AH>  with this teacher was that she didn't... (sigh).

JB>  ...And may only connect on a superficial level at the
JB>  best of times.


         Now that you mention it, that does sum things up quite well....  :-)



JB>  It's funny, but when I typed the above, I didn't make
JB>  a conscious distinction between fragility and insecurity,
JB>  but obviously I had compassion toward the first, and
JB>  distain toward the second. I think this points out how a
JB>  correspondent as yourself can be such a rewarding exchange.


         Thankyou.  I hadn't consciously thought about it much either, but when
you made a distinction I realized I'd been doing the same.  Your comments often
inspire me to think more deeply & vice versa.  I also find that rewarding.  :-)




--- timEd/386 1.10.y2k+
 * Origin: Wits' End, Vancouver CANADA (1:153/716)