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Text 254, 104 rader
Skriven 2004-10-02 19:42:00 av Greg Sears
     Kommentar till en text av HEATHER LENNOX
Ärende: Jokes in F UNNY....
===========================
  Date: 13 Jul 99  22:45:40
  From: Jesse James

BOY, WAS MY FACE RED!!
(from Woman's World - various issues)

(î`ú.÷÷.úïî`ú.÷÷.úïî`ú.÷÷.úïî`ú.÷÷.úïî`ú.÷÷.úïî)

I was taking a shower when my two-year-old son came into the
bathroom and wrapped himself in toilet paper.
Although he made a mess, he looked
adorable, so I ran for my camera and took a few shots.

They came out so well that I had copies made and included one with
each of our Christmas cards.  Days later, a relative called about the
picture, laughing hysterically, and suggested I take a closer look at
it.

Puzzled, I stared at the photo and was shocked to discover that in
addition to my son, I had captured my reflection in the mirror -
wearing nothing but a camera!  This is one holiday greeting my family
will never forget!   (D.D. Duluth, Minnesota)

(î`ú.÷÷.úïî`ú.÷÷.úïî`ú.÷÷.úïî`ú.÷÷.úïî`ú.÷÷.úïî)

I needed to go grocery shopping and run some errands, so I took my
preschooler with me.  I gave him a lollipop to keep him occupied for
a while but by the time we got to the market, he didn't have it any
more.  Assuming he'd dropped it, I didn't think about it again.
We finished grocery shopping and continued on our way.

I noticed people giving me strange smiles all day, but I didn't put
two and two together until I got home.  that's when, as I put away the
groceries, I ran my fingers through my hair - and discovered the
missing lollipop stuck firmly to my head!

Boy, was I embarrassed thinking about how many people
had seen me that way!   (R.S. Baltimore MD)

(î`ú.÷÷.úïî`ú.÷÷.úïî`ú.÷÷.úïî`ú.÷÷.úïî`ú.÷÷.úïî)

I had just finished taking a shower when I realized I didn't have a
clean towel. Heading to the laundry room, I suddenly stopped in my
tracks as I passed through the living room. Seeing my sister at the
front door receiving a pizza delivery. I quickly backed into the
hallway.

Unfortunately for me, my feet were wet and I ended up slipping and
falling flat on my face. My sister and the pizza delivery guy turned
to look at me, stunned while I quickly scrambled into the other room.
but I was mortified -- and now I make sure I have towels nearby
BEFORE I get in the shower!

(î`ú.÷÷.úïî`ú.÷÷.úïî`ú.÷÷.úïî`ú.÷÷.úïî`ú.÷÷.úïî)

I had been having trouble with my cable TV, so I was fed up when one
day, I turned on the set and again found it wasn't working.  Furious, I
called the cable company and chewed them out, demanding
they send someone to fix the problem once and for all.

When the technician arrived, he checked the cable hookups while I
waited impatiently in the kitchen.  Finally, he told me he'd found the
problem.  "It's about time!" I replied. "What's wrong now?"
"Your TV was unplugged!" he said.
Now I make sure my appliances are plugged in,
before I start complaining!   (LF  Riverside, NJ)

(î`ú.÷÷.úïî`ú.÷÷.úïî`ú.÷÷.úïî`ú.÷÷.úïî`ú.÷÷.úïî)

My friend and I were at a concert, and I needed to use the ladies'
room. As we made our way across the busy lobby, I saw an opening
in the crowd.  I grabbed my friend's hand so we wouldn't get
separated and sped through the masses of people.
I'd almost made it to the ladies' room when I heard someone yell
above the noise, "Excuse me, I think you have the wrong hand!"
I turned and was shocked to see I was holding a strange man's hand!
Totally embarrassed, I apologized and made my way back to
my friend, who was still where I'd left her.
Now I look closely before I grab anything.   (RN    Durham, NC)

(î`ú.÷÷.úïî`ú.÷÷.úïî`ú.÷÷.úïî`ú.÷÷.úïî`ú.÷÷.úïî)

I work at a car-rental agency, and one day, I was training a new
agent. One of the first things I teach is the profile of an
"undesirable renter": someone who looks suspicious or unkempt or is
wearing dirty or torn clothing.
As I was stressing this to her, I looked up and saw a shady-looking
man holding a brown paper bag headed our way.
Seizing the opportunity, I said brightly, "Look at that man.  He's a
perfect example of the kind of person we don't want to rent to."
The woman gave me an icy look and replied,
"That happens to be my husband!"
Now I keep all real-life examples to myself.

.    @@@@
.     0 0 Cheers,
.      )
.      O  I C E-man


 * SLMR 2.1a * Heather. . i'm from the government, i raise beer prices!

--- EzyQwk V2.01b005 00F90260
 * Origin: Milky Way, Langley, BC [604] 532-4367 (1:153/307)