Text 4249, 160 rader
Skriven 2006-05-23 08:24:14 av Greg Sears (3:633/104)
     Kommentar till en text av George Pope
Ärende: Re: Prymid spam joke
============================
 GS>    > Here's what you do:
   >    > 1. Get a job
   >
   >    WHERE?????????

 Echo: FUNNY
 Date: 15-May-2006 08:03
 Read:" Re: Prymid spam joke "
 George Pope Put A SMILE on Greg Sears's  DIAL #[:-)] 

 GP> Okay, maybe I should have said FIND ; job. . .

 George Pope, Have you read this one. . .  THE GURU


We have our very own agony Aunt (agony Uncle to be honest)!

Dear GURU
         My girlfriend insists that I wear a condom when I screw her but
I think it spoils sex, we've tried the pill but it keeps falling out of
her Fanny.  What else do you suggest.

     WILD STALLION.

Dear Wild Stallion
         (A better name for you is MY LITTLE PONY)  You sound like a bit
of a dickhead to me so wear the condom on your head and screw her while
wearing it there.  As for the pill it wouldn't fall out if you tipped
the silly cow upside down would it.


Dear GURU
         I've only got four inches, I cant get it hard in the middle,
and I Suffer from premature ejaculation, is there anything you can
suggest I can do.
     Ivor Littlehampton

Dear Ivor
         A gun is in the post to you.


Dear Guru
         I really do have a problem My problem is I cant talk about my
problems so I cant tell you what my problems are because I can't talk
about my problems that's my problem Is this a problem.

     Confused.

Dear Confused
             So am I.


Dear Guru
         My brother makes me sleep with his friends and do all sorts of
things for them and too them they pay my brother five pounds an hour.
My question is do you think I should have a share of the money?

     Sally.

Dear Sally
          No!  But I think your brother should raise his prices if your
as good as you sound.


> OBJoke: for our Moderator and all-round friend/servant

        FERTILE GERALD AND PISCES POEMS

          In a land called Hinkletown
               Hugo ate his duck
        The duck had been quite naughty
          And had now ran out of luck

            Now little Henry Winkler
         He watched this with a fright
        He thought that it was terrible
          And buggered off for a shite

          He entered the Gents toilets
            And sat down for a plop
        He squeezed outta nice long one
       And gave it to a man called `Stop`

         Stop rather liked the turn-out
             He wore it on his head
          The only time he took it off
            Was when he went to bed

      He would put it in a glass of water
            And give it to his wife
      Then he gave her the glass of water
         And she mixed it with a knife

           His wife was known as Aids
               Hugo wondered why
       Then Stop said, to sleep with her
             Would cause you to die

         Meanwhile, back in Hinkletown
             Hugo digested his duck
           Feeling rather sparky now
         He asked his missus for a Fuck

          His missus refused the offer
             So Hugo used his head
        He went and shagged Aids instaed
          Unfortunately now he`s dead

          They held a funeral for him
            The Vicar was very good
          He remembered all his words
            But then again he should

      Stop stood there, by the coffin-side
            He was scared and upset
        When he thought of Hugo`s death
            His trousers got all wet

          He enjoyed shagging corpses
           He had seen Nekromantik 2
      Perhaps he would try it on with Hugo
   Or perhaps he`d pork his Gramp called Stu

            He decided straight away
              Hugo had a nicer bum
        So Stop climbed into the coffin
         And splashed Hugo with his cum

         The Vicar was most distraught
          And kicked Stop in the belly
            Stop heaved and belched
            And landed in some jelly

         Where had the jelly come from?
        It looked like fat womens` buts
       Then all of a sudden Stop realized
         The jelly was from Hugo`s guts

            The jelly was all slimy
           It smelt like chicken-soup
         It looked like something awful
         It was just a big, green goop.

        We`ll have to stop the poem now
            My dinner`s on the table
        If you want to know what happens
       You`ll have to ask my Auntie Mabel


         ._ _.
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  E-man (_)(_)  (_)  AWGTHTGTTSA

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